hombre_de_plata_flaco
Bronze Member
OK, so the other day I was a bank looking for some halves. After I was told there were none to be had, I inquired about a $100 "I-Series" US Savings Bond. I was directed to speak with some lady who I presume holds a higher position than the tellers. Not sure if she was a bank manager or what, but I went into her office, sat down and asked about purchasing a bond.
Bank Lady: "Are you sure you want one of these? The fixed rate is ZERO percent."
Hombre: "Yeah... I know that, but the variable rate is 4.6% so I'd like one please."
Bank Lady: "I see you only have $75.00 in your account. You will have to make a deposit before you buy one."
Hombre: "I can't just pay cash for it?"
Bank Lady: "No."
Hombre: "Forget it. Thanks anyway."
I then walked out, drove across town to another branch of the SAME BANK, and purchased a $100 US Savings Bond for cash with no problems whatsoever. I only use this account for my eBay transactions and I don't like keeping any amount of money in their vaults.
Here's why:
I just want to tell you all a little bit about this bank. It is a local company. This bank collapsed due to a bunch of "Good ol' Boys" handing out loans to all their buddies who could not pay them back. Any hick around here with a truck and a pair of Chippewas was getting an unlimited line of credit to build spec houses no one wanted or could afford. It was all a big illusion. The head of the bank was also sent to prison for 10 years for running a kickback scam with his two friends. He was too big a wimp to show up for his federal sentencing so he kept having "accidents" like cutting himself with a chainsaw or faking a heart attack every time he came up for sentencing. He finally surrendered to the feds and is currently rotting away in prison where criminals like him belong.
This bank bilked the people of my county out of MILLIONS of dollars. In the last week I have spoken with two elderly people who owned stock in this bank for their retirement. One guy lost $200,000 and was forced to return to manual labor at the age of 65 to work for $8.00/hour. The other was an elderly lady and matriarch of a prominent local family who lost $350,000 and now has only $1,500 to her name and has been forced to go on government assistance. Many citizens lost their entire life savings to these creeps.
A bank called South Carolina Bank and Trust was paid by the Obama Administration to purchase the toxic assets of this bank, so now the state of South Carolina basically owns my entire county now.
Anyway, I went back to this bank today to cash a check.
After I got my cash, I went to the [delete] lady's office and plopped down in a chair and stared at her.
Bank Lady: "Can I help you sir?"
Hombre: "You sure can. I'd like to know why I can't purchase a Savings Bond here at this branch, but I can drive across town and purchase one with no problem whatsoever?"
Bank Lady: "You didn't have enough money in your ac-"
Hombre: "At the other branch I paid cash."
*silence*
Hombre: "I like to keep all my funds in Regions Bank since I don't have to worry about them defaulting and losing all my money. You would figure that a bank that bilked half of the elderly population of Habersham county out of their retirement would be going out of their way to be nice to the small amount of customers they have left."
*silence*
Hombre: "I'd also be willing to bet the branch manager there actually knows the proper amount of interest these bonds draw - which is NOT 0%. I also like to keep some money in my wallet, which is obviously safer than keeping money here in your bank. A thief in the night lifting my wallet from my back pocket might actually give me a chance to fight him off and reclaim my money, whereas this bank would give me no such courtesy. The fact that you refused to sell me a bond unless I made a deposit in your crummy bank makes me think you are either too lazy to do your job, too dumb to type in the bond request, or that you just don't like me. Do you not like me madam? Do you not appreciate my business? I know I don't own $100,000 dollars worth of stock you can make disappear in the middle of the night, but I have had this account for over 10 years and I think that has to count for something, right?"
Bank Lady: "Sir, I am going to have to ask you to leave. I will call the police if I have to."
Hombre: "PPPFFFFFTTTTTT! *rolls eyes* That wouldn't be the first time that has happened. I might even get to share a cell with your former boss. You probably
since you are too stupid to know the variable rate on a savings bond."
Bank Lady: "WAAAAAAAAAH!"
Mission accomplished, but I doubt I will be ordering any boxes of halves from this branch in the future.
Happy Hunting!
Bank Lady: "Are you sure you want one of these? The fixed rate is ZERO percent."
Hombre: "Yeah... I know that, but the variable rate is 4.6% so I'd like one please."
Bank Lady: "I see you only have $75.00 in your account. You will have to make a deposit before you buy one."
Hombre: "I can't just pay cash for it?"
Bank Lady: "No."
Hombre: "Forget it. Thanks anyway."
I then walked out, drove across town to another branch of the SAME BANK, and purchased a $100 US Savings Bond for cash with no problems whatsoever. I only use this account for my eBay transactions and I don't like keeping any amount of money in their vaults.
Here's why:
I just want to tell you all a little bit about this bank. It is a local company. This bank collapsed due to a bunch of "Good ol' Boys" handing out loans to all their buddies who could not pay them back. Any hick around here with a truck and a pair of Chippewas was getting an unlimited line of credit to build spec houses no one wanted or could afford. It was all a big illusion. The head of the bank was also sent to prison for 10 years for running a kickback scam with his two friends. He was too big a wimp to show up for his federal sentencing so he kept having "accidents" like cutting himself with a chainsaw or faking a heart attack every time he came up for sentencing. He finally surrendered to the feds and is currently rotting away in prison where criminals like him belong.
This bank bilked the people of my county out of MILLIONS of dollars. In the last week I have spoken with two elderly people who owned stock in this bank for their retirement. One guy lost $200,000 and was forced to return to manual labor at the age of 65 to work for $8.00/hour. The other was an elderly lady and matriarch of a prominent local family who lost $350,000 and now has only $1,500 to her name and has been forced to go on government assistance. Many citizens lost their entire life savings to these creeps.
A bank called South Carolina Bank and Trust was paid by the Obama Administration to purchase the toxic assets of this bank, so now the state of South Carolina basically owns my entire county now.
Anyway, I went back to this bank today to cash a check.
After I got my cash, I went to the [delete] lady's office and plopped down in a chair and stared at her.
Bank Lady: "Can I help you sir?"
Hombre: "You sure can. I'd like to know why I can't purchase a Savings Bond here at this branch, but I can drive across town and purchase one with no problem whatsoever?"
Bank Lady: "You didn't have enough money in your ac-"
Hombre: "At the other branch I paid cash."
*silence*
Hombre: "I like to keep all my funds in Regions Bank since I don't have to worry about them defaulting and losing all my money. You would figure that a bank that bilked half of the elderly population of Habersham county out of their retirement would be going out of their way to be nice to the small amount of customers they have left."
*silence*
Hombre: "I'd also be willing to bet the branch manager there actually knows the proper amount of interest these bonds draw - which is NOT 0%. I also like to keep some money in my wallet, which is obviously safer than keeping money here in your bank. A thief in the night lifting my wallet from my back pocket might actually give me a chance to fight him off and reclaim my money, whereas this bank would give me no such courtesy. The fact that you refused to sell me a bond unless I made a deposit in your crummy bank makes me think you are either too lazy to do your job, too dumb to type in the bond request, or that you just don't like me. Do you not like me madam? Do you not appreciate my business? I know I don't own $100,000 dollars worth of stock you can make disappear in the middle of the night, but I have had this account for over 10 years and I think that has to count for something, right?"
Bank Lady: "Sir, I am going to have to ask you to leave. I will call the police if I have to."
Hombre: "PPPFFFFFTTTTTT! *rolls eyes* That wouldn't be the first time that has happened. I might even get to share a cell with your former boss. You probably
since you are too stupid to know the variable rate on a savings bond."Bank Lady: "WAAAAAAAAAH!"
Mission accomplished, but I doubt I will be ordering any boxes of halves from this branch in the future.
Happy Hunting!
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