Guys are Just Happier People
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  1. #1
    nz
    AKiwi

    Aug 2005
    Hastings, NZ
    Garrett GTA 500
    430
    10 times

    Guys are Just Happier People

    Men Are Just Happier People

    NICKNAMES

    If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah.

    If Mike , Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, D**khead and Sh*t for Brains.


    EATING OUT

    When the bill arrives, Mike , Dave and John will each throw in $20, even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back..

    When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

    MONEY

    A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

    A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale.

    BATHROOMS

    A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel.
    The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337.
    A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.

    ARGUMENTS

    A woman has the last word in any argument.

    Anything a man says after that, is the beginning of a new argument.

    FUTURE

    A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

    A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

    SUCCESS

    A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

    A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

    MARRIAGE

    A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

    A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.

    DRESSING UP

    A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the trash, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.
    A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

    NATURAL

    Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed..

    Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

    OFFSPRING

    Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.

    A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.


    THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

    A married man should forget his mistakes. There's no use in two people remembering the same thing!
    The Road to Hell is paved with Good Intentions

  2. #2
    gb
    Leggo Master of the UK

    Aug 2009
    Ankh-Morpork
    Goldmaxx Power and Canon 7D and Viagra supplier
    2,994
    144 times
    Metal Detecting and Conservation
    Banner Finds (3)

    Re: Guys are Just Happier People

    .


    hammered

    Because it's always hammer time

  3. #3

    Jun 2003
    San Antonio, Texas
    Whites DFX, MXT X2, Exploder, and Classic III
    463
    22 times

    Re: Guys are Just Happier People

    How true
    Saving History, one Piece at a time!

  4. #4
    stefen

    Re: Guys are Just Happier People

    As it happens, I'm having lunch with Fat Boy, D**khead and Sh*t for Brains, today

  5. #5
    ca
    Dec 2004
    Innisfil On Canada
    726
    39 times

    Re: Guys are Just Happier People

    This is all because a man only has two emotions.. Hungry and Horny..
    So woman! If he's not stiff, make him a sandwich!

 

 

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