In Honor of Chugs Birthday Today
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  1. #1
    us
    Wheres The Gold

    Feb 2010
    Vancouver WA
    Chug)Whites Classic 5 ID, (Red Whites Coin master Pro) Chug and Reds New Additions Give It Up>> Garrett's AT Pro Buttercup>> Garrett's Ace 250 Show Me the Money>> Garrets Ace 400
    7,392
    2637 times
    Metal Detecting
    Honorable Mentions (1)

    In Honor of Chug's Birthday Today

    $5.37
    It could happen to any of us.. This is so funny; I hope you enjoy it.



    $5.37!
    That's what the kid behind the counter at Taco Bell said to me.
    I dug into my pocket and pulled out some lint and two dimes and something that used to be a Jolly Rancher.
    Having already handed the kid a five-spot, I started to head back out to the truck to grab some change when the kid with the Elmo hairdo said the hardest thing anyone has ever said to me.
    He said, "It's OK. I'll just give you the senior citizen discount."

    I turned to see who he was talking to and then heard the sound of change hitting the counter in front of me.
    "Only $4.68" he said cheerfully.

    I stood there stupefied. I am 48, not even 60 yet?
    A mere child!
    Senior citizen?

    I took my burrito and walked out to the truck wondering what was wrong with Elmo.
    Was he blind?
    As I sat in the truck, my blood began to boil.
    Old? Me?

    I'll show him, I thought.
    I opened the door and headed back inside. I strode to the counter,
    and there he was waiting with a smile.

    Before I could say a word, he held up something and
    jingled it in front of me,
    like I could be that easily distracted!
    What am I now?
    A toddler?

    "Dude! Can't get too far without your car keys, eh?"
    I stared with utter disdain at the keys.
    I began to rationalize in my mind!

    "Leaving keys behind hardly makes a man elderly!
    It could happen to anyone!"

    I turned and headed back to the truck.
    I slipped the key into the ignition, but it wouldn't turn.
    What now?
    I checked my keys and tried another.
    Still nothing.

    That's when I noticed the purple beads hanging from my rear view mirror.
    I had no purple beads hanging from my
    rear view mirror.

    Then, a few other objects came into focus:
    There was a car seat in the back seat, I don't have a back seat.
    Happy Meal toys spread all over the floorboard.
    A partially eaten doughnut on the dashboard.

    Faster than you can say ginkgo biloba, I flew out of the alien vehicle.

    Moments later I was speeding out of the parking lot,
    relieved to finally be leaving this nightmarish stop in my life.
    That is when I felt it, deep in the bowels of my stomach: hunger!
    My stomach growled and churned, and I reached to grab my burrito,
    only it was nowhere to be found.

    I swung the truck around, gathered my courage,
    and strode back into the restaurant one final time.
    There Elmo stood, draped in youth and black nail polish.
    All I could think was, "What is the world coming to?"

    All I could say was, "Did I leave my food and drink in here"?
    At this point I was ready to ask a Boy Scout to help me back to my vehicle,
    and then go straight home and apply for Social Security benefits.

    Elmo had no clue.
    I walked back out to the truck,
    and suddenly a young lad came up and tugged on my jeans to get my attention.
    He was holding up a drink and a bag.
    His mother explained,
    "I think you left this in my truck by mistake."

    I took the food and drink from the little boy and sheepishly apologized.

    She offered these kind words:
    "It's OK. My grandfather does stuff like this all the time."

    All of this is to explain how I got a ticket doing 85 in a 40 mph zone.
    Yessss, I was racing some punk kid in a Toyota Prius.
    And no, I told the officer, I'm not too old to be driving this fast.

    As I walked in the front door, my wife met me halfway down the hall.
    I handed her a bag of cold food and a $300 speeding ticket.
    I promptly sat in my rocking chair and covered up my legs with a blankey, and sucked down a cold beer.

    The good news was I had successfully found my way home.

    Happy birthday Chug, remember your not getting older, your aging to perfection! I love you whole bunches and hope your day goes as smooth as possible!
    Red
    "It cant Always Be Silver Or Gold But It Is A Hell Of an Experience Pulling It Out Of the Dirt"

    Metal detecting is Like A Marathon, Your Running fast then start Slowing A Bit The You Find Something Interesting And You Pick Up the Pace!!! The Only Difference is If You Are Addicted to this Hobby there Is NO FINISH LINE HH Chug And Red

  2. #2
    stefen
    The pampers are in the hall closet....
    Chug And Red likes this.

  3. #3
    us
    Feb 2008
    Morgantown,WV
    Bounty Hunter Landstar
    4,618
    1001 times
    Just one more wrinkle in his birthday suit
    Chug And Red likes this.
    Wolfpack forever

  4. #4
    us
    Jan 2007
    Northen New Mexico
    don't laugh viper trident/ E.Trac
    491
    106 times
    Metal Detecting
    I'm not so sure I like this post...............Oh well happy birthday to...............humm whats his name?
    Chug And Red likes this.
    I took the road less traveled------------------- and now I'm lost
    The secret to a long life ....................... make sure the sailor at the helm can't swim

  5. #5
    us
    Ridgecrawler

    Jan 2011
    East central Ohio
    ATPRO
    67
    16 times
    Metal Detecting
    I like this post,Nobody asks me if I am old enough for the senior discount anymore. Happy bday Chug..
    eyeguy and Chug And Red like this.

  6. #6
    gb
    Shirley

    Nov 2007
    Birmingham
    847
    356 times
    Happy birthday Chug, may you have many more.
    Chug And Red likes this.

  7. #7
    Charter Member
    us
    Jan 2006
    SE Louisiana
    Garrett AT Pro & Ace 250
    20,793
    2432 times
    All Types Of Treasure Hunting
    Honorable Mentions (1)
    Name:  Birthdaymouse.gif
Views: 294
Size:  38.4 KB Happy Birthday, Chug!!
    Last edited by River Rat; Apr 26, 2012 at 04:48 PM.
    Chug And Red likes this.





  8. #8
    us
    Oct 2011
    Keystone state
    AT-Pro,Ace 150, flea market digger
    3,976
    1762 times
    All Types Of Treasure Hunting
    SO CHUG CAN READ THIS HAPPY B DAY
    Chug And Red likes this.

  9. #9
    stefen
    Chug,

    Have a great time gumming your birthday cake...Hope Red was able to get a cake with soft icing...
    Chug And Red likes this.

  10. #10
    us
    Dennis

    Jan 2012
    Montana
    White's MXT
    6,906
    6184 times
    All Types Of Treasure Hunting
    Banner Finds (2)
    HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! Chug. May you have many more birthdays. And Red, take it easy on the OLD boy!
    Chug And Red likes this.

  11. #11
    us
    Wheres The Gold

    Feb 2010
    Vancouver WA
    Chug)Whites Classic 5 ID, (Red Whites Coin master Pro) Chug and Reds New Additions Give It Up>> Garrett's AT Pro Buttercup>> Garrett's Ace 250 Show Me the Money>> Garrets Ace 400
    7,392
    2637 times
    Metal Detecting
    Honorable Mentions (1)
    Your all So Damn FUNNY!!! Loved it Chug!!! I was Laughing so Hard I had to wife tears from my eye's <<<<<<no that is not a spelling error!!!
    stefen likes this.
    "It cant Always Be Silver Or Gold But It Is A Hell Of an Experience Pulling It Out Of the Dirt"

    Metal detecting is Like A Marathon, Your Running fast then start Slowing A Bit The You Find Something Interesting And You Pick Up the Pace!!! The Only Difference is If You Are Addicted to this Hobby there Is NO FINISH LINE HH Chug And Red

  12. #12
    us
    Wheres The Gold

    Feb 2010
    Vancouver WA
    Chug)Whites Classic 5 ID, (Red Whites Coin master Pro) Chug and Reds New Additions Give It Up>> Garrett's AT Pro Buttercup>> Garrett's Ace 250 Show Me the Money>> Garrets Ace 400
    7,392
    2637 times
    Metal Detecting
    Honorable Mentions (1)
    Quote Originally Posted by stefen View Post
    Chug,

    Have a great time gumming your birthday cake...Hope Red was able to get a cake with soft icing...
    Thanks I called Red from work And She said that A Neighbor made Me Something!! I thought Cool A Cake!!! NOT Something Better 5 Breakfast Burritos!!! Im Not Sharing !!!! LOL
    "It cant Always Be Silver Or Gold But It Is A Hell Of an Experience Pulling It Out Of the Dirt"

    Metal detecting is Like A Marathon, Your Running fast then start Slowing A Bit The You Find Something Interesting And You Pick Up the Pace!!! The Only Difference is If You Are Addicted to this Hobby there Is NO FINISH LINE HH Chug And Red

  13. #13
    us
    Wheres The Gold

    Feb 2010
    Vancouver WA
    Chug)Whites Classic 5 ID, (Red Whites Coin master Pro) Chug and Reds New Additions Give It Up>> Garrett's AT Pro Buttercup>> Garrett's Ace 250 Show Me the Money>> Garrets Ace 400
    7,392
    2637 times
    Metal Detecting
    Honorable Mentions (1)
    Quote Originally Posted by old digger View Post
    HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! Chug. May you have many more birthdays. And Red, take it easy on the OLD boy!
    LOL I'll try to go easy on him, but he is so cute!!!! Red
    "It cant Always Be Silver Or Gold But It Is A Hell Of an Experience Pulling It Out Of the Dirt"

    Metal detecting is Like A Marathon, Your Running fast then start Slowing A Bit The You Find Something Interesting And You Pick Up the Pace!!! The Only Difference is If You Are Addicted to this Hobby there Is NO FINISH LINE HH Chug And Red

  14. #14
    stefen
    Quote Originally Posted by Chug And Red View Post
    LOL I'll try to go easy on him, but he is so cute!!!! Red
    Suspect his blowing-out-the-candle wish may come true...

  15. #15
    us
    Dennis

    Jan 2012
    Montana
    White's MXT
    6,906
    6184 times
    All Types Of Treasure Hunting
    Banner Finds (2)
    Well; Chug, I hope you had a nice birthday? And hope that Red helped you blow out the candles on the cake. Good Luck and have many more.

 

 
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