Interpreter

[coazon de oro]

Long ago here in Texas, a Mexican came across the border, and robbed a bank. They caught him quickly, but there was no money on him. Where was the money hidden? The Bandit spoke no English, so the Sheriff called for an interpreter.
"Ask him if he admits robbing the bank". Yes, the interpreter told him. The Sheriff cocked his pistol, and held it to the Bandit's head. "Ask him where he hid the money". The Bandit told the interpreter that he threw it down the town's well. The interpreter translated, "He says he's not afraid to die".

 

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[bzbadger]

Ok I read it 4 times and just don't get it. Its rare being a the comedian I am that I don't get a joke.

 

[BigWaveDave]

Ok I read it 4 times and just don't get it. Its rare being a the comedian I am that I don't get a joke.

The bandit told the interpreter where the money was, but since the sheriff doesn't speak Spanish, the interpreter lied to him, saying he "isn't afraid to die" ....So that the sheriff would pop the bandit, and then the interpreter, unbeknownst to the sheriff, would go to the well, and recover the stolen money.

 

[PROSPECTORMIKEL]

THE LAST TIME THAT I NEEDED A TRANSLATOR IT WAS FOR A VERY CONDESCENDING GERMAN ENGINEER ASSIGNED TO OVERSEE A SECRET PART OF AN AMERICAN MACHINE.
HE WOULD LOOK AT THE BLUEPRINTS AND GIVE ME A PIECE OF PAPER WITH A NUMBER.

I WOULD GO FIND THE PART WITH THE MATCHING NUMBER AND SET IT IN PLACE.
HE WOULD THEN SAY " PUT IN BOLTS. I COME BACK. I AM LOOK. YOU TIGHTEN BOLTS.

A DAY AND A HALF LATER WE HAD THREE "I" BEAMS IN PLACE AND MY BOSS ASKED WHY. I TOLD HIM "I DON'T READ GERMAN." HE SENT ME A TRANSLATOR. I ASKED HIM TO TRANSLATE FOUR WORDS ON THE BLUEPRINTS.

THE NEXT TIME THE ENGINEER LEFT THE BREAK ROOM TO GIVE ME A NUMBER, WE HAD THE FRAME SET AND LEVELED USING HIS EQUIPMENT.

I ASKED HIM IF HE HAD EVER SEEN THE AMERICAN MOVIE, "DELIVERANCE"?

ALL OF A SUDDEN HE HAD A REVELATION AND COULD SPEAK VERY GOOD ENGLISH.

WE GOT ALONG VERY WELL AFTER THAT.

#/;0)~

 

[bzbadger]

The bandit told the interpreter where the money was, but since the sheriff doesn't speak Spanish, the interpreter lied to him, saying he "isn't afraid to die" ....So that the sheriff would pop the bandit, and then the interpreter, unbeknownst to the sheriff, would go to the well, and recover the stolen money.

Ok then I was getting the joke the whole time, I thought that's what it meant I guess the problem was it just wasn't that funny. Sorry OP.

 

[Rebel - KGC]

Ok then I was getting the joke the whole time, I thought that's what it meant I guess the problem was it just wasn't that funny. Sorry OP.

HA! I thought it was about SIGN LANGUAGE interpreter...

 

[PROSPECTORMIKEL]

TEXAS BORN JAILER

FIRST; I THINK THAT IT IS FUNNY. PROBABLY BECAUSE I WAS BORN ABOUT 60 MILES FROM THE TEXAS/ MEXICO BORDER. I COULD SEE THAT HAPPEN ABOUT A HALF CENTURY AGO. AND IT IS NOT A TRUE STORY. IT IS A JOKE.... NOT NECESSARILY POLITICALLY CORRECT, BUT STILL A GOOD JOKE.

SECOND; LATER IN LIFE I WAS A JAILER IN A FAIRLY RURAL COUNTY. AND I WORKED THE NIGHT SHIFT. EVERY TIME THAT I HAD A DRUNK BROUGHT IN THAT COULDN'T UNDERSTAND HOW TO BLOW ON THE STRAW ON THE B.A.C. DATA-MASTER, THEY DIDN'T SPEAK ENGLISH. MY RECOURSE OFFICERS THAT WERE MULTILINGUAL, WERE ALL FROM THE DAY SHIFT. I HAD ONE THAT DID NOT LIKE TO GET OUT OF BED AT 2 A.M. TO TRANSLATE. WHEN THEY EXPLAINED (TRANSLATED) THAT THEY WERE GOING TO GO TO JAIL FOR REFUSING TO DO IT RIGHT, ALL OF A SUDDEN, THEY COULD SPEAK ENGLISH.

THERE WERE A FEW TIMES THAT I THOUGHT THAT HE WAS GOING TO HOLD A GUN TO THEIR HEAD.
HE NEVER DID, BUT I THOUGHT HE WAS, AND FROM THE LOOK IN THE DRUNKS EYES, SO DID THEY.

WHILE I'M ON THE SUBJECT... WHY DO I HAVE TO PUSH 1 FOR ENGLISH WHEN ALL THEY ARE GOING TO DO IS TRANSFER ME TO SOME ONE ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE PLANET, THAT DOESN'T SPEAK ENGLISH??

THAT'S JUST THE WAY I WAS RAISED TO SEE THE WORLD.

MIKEL
#/;0)~

 

[Bullet:Mich.]

Its a joke easy to understand. I thought it was funny.

 

[diggummup]

Its a joke easy to understand. I thought it was funny.

Yeah, same here. Clever too.

 

[BigWaveDave]

It reminds me of the redneck who got bit by a rattlesnake on his *****, and started to panic.... Gets his friend to call the doctor for life-saving advice. The doctor tells the friend that he needs to vigorously suck the venom from the wound immediately in order to survive the bite. Friend hangs up the phone, redneck desperately asks "what did the Doctor say?"

Friend says...."you're gonna die"

 

[bzbadger]

It reminds me of the redneck who got bit by a rattlesnake on his *****, and started to panic.... Gets his friend to call the doctor for life-saving advice. The doctor tells the friend that he needs to vigorously suck the venom from the wound immediately in order to survive the bite. Friend hangs up the phone, redneck desperately asks "what did the Doctor say?"

Friend says...."you're gonna die"

Ok just want to see what kind of men we have here. If bitten on your "manhood" by rattlesnake would you beg your friend to suck out the poison? Would you consider amputation of said manhood? Would you wait for death? Personally I know my friends and that ain't happening so I choose option 3..death.

 

[PROSPECTORMIKEL]

BZBADGER, I AGREE WITH THE OPTION, HOWEVER; IF I COULD MAKE IT HOME TO MY WIFE, I WOULD TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE SWELLING, ONE MORE TIME, JUST SO SHE WOULD SPEAK WELL OF ME AFTER I WAS GONE.
#/;0)~

 

[bzbadger]

BZBADGER, I AGREE WITH THE OPTION, HOWEVER; IF I COULD MAKE IT HOME TO MY WIFE, I WOULD TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE SWELLING, ONE MORE TIME, JUST SO SHE WOULD SPEAK WELL OF ME AFTER I WAS GONE.
#/;0)~

My wife wouldn't she would say I was lying just to get her to, so id die for sure.

 

[BigWaveDave]

I suspect I would live, because my buddy owes me one.....
He would die, cuz I don't owe him one.

 

[BigWaveDave]

I suspect I would live, because my buddy owes me one.....
He would die, cuz I don't owe him one.

not what it sounds like hahahaha

 

[Rebel - KGC]

INTERESTING question to bring up... "on a Date", LOL!