you guys/gals ever felt the call of nature

[Ray in CA]

When I was a kid my parents built a cabin up in the Sierra mountains, so my brother and I spent a lot of time out in the woods hunting or fishing. And, as one would expect, nature would always come calling on us far away from our cabin.

Fortunately for us, there was a particular plant that grew tall in the meadows and had broad, velvety leaves. We had no idea what kind of plant it was but we aptly named it the "toilet paper plant."

It was softer than Charmin.

Ray

 

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[stoney56]

Fortunately for us, there was a particular plant that grew tall in the meadows and had broad, velvety leaves. We had no idea what kind of plant it was but we aptly named it the "toilet paper plant."

It was softer than Charmin.

Ray

As long as they weren't covered with chiggers.

Swing, scratch. swing, scratch....

 

[Bigcypresshunter]

I did the #2 one time last year. It was a super cold day...the windchill was -10...apple cider and beans for lunch, so picture that explosion. I properly disposed of the "dirty" tissues in my digging pouch...I didn't want to litter out in the woods.

I hope those tissues were in the trash side of your digging pouch and not the treasure side. I always put the s*** in the trash side myself. LMAO

I would never save sh*t paper. Thats disgusting and I dont believe you did that. I burn it. You need to stir it a little to burn completely but make sure you watch it! My friend caught the woods on fire doing this.
I have a hunting buddy that never carries TP. He often comes back from the woods with sections of his t-shirt missing.

Keep some tissue in a zip-lock bag and it will be dry when you need it.

 

[Ray in CA]

As long as they weren't covered with chiggers.

No chiggers in CA that I'm aware of. But it's a good thing we didn't have an allergic reaction! LOL

Ray

 

[Evolution]

When I was a kid my parents built a cabin up in the Sierra mountains, so my brother and I spent a lot of time out in the woods hunting or fishing. And, as one would expect, nature would always come calling on us far away from our cabin.

Fortunately for us, there was a particular plant that grew tall in the meadows and had broad, velvety leaves. We had no idea what kind of plant it was but we aptly named it the "toilet paper plant."

It was softer than Charmin.

Ray

Good thing the "toilet paper" plant wasn't poisonous...... I couldn't imagine getting a poison ivy type rash on my bunghole.

 

[Old Dog]

I keep a pair of swampers behind the seat of the truck for many reasons,
but inside one of them is my "truck roll" toilet paper.
I usually carry a half roll in my pack as well.
If you can't find a place to keep your Geo hammer from bashing into things...
drop it down the center of the roll in the boot and all will stay put until you move it.

OD

 

[stefen]

When I was a kid my parents built a cabin up in the Sierra mountains, so my brother and I spent a lot of time out in the woods hunting or fishing. And, as one would expect, nature would always come calling on us far away from our cabin.

Fortunately for us, there was a particular plant that grew tall in the meadows and had broad, velvety leaves. We had no idea what kind of plant it was but we aptly named it the "toilet paper plant."

It was softer than Charmin.

Ray

Good thing the "toilet paper" plant wasn't poisonous...... I couldn't imagine getting a poison ivy type rash on my bunghole.

Let me tell you a story about my experiences with an itchy....

 

[Paul in WA]

This is a true story ..................

My younger brother & I went on a hunting trip (well, he hunted.....I melted snow with my arse & pretended to be a wildlife photographer) in Northern Michigan when we were in our early 20's. For those of you not familiar with "Hunting" trips.......most of them are spent in a local bar. This hunting trip was for the opening of deer season, and like most devoted deer hunters, we arrived a few day early to settle in & pick out out spots for opening day. The night before opening morning, we hit the local bar and about drank them dry, and then returned to out hotel at god only knows what time in the morning. Rather than get what few moments of sleep we could, we decided to go to Denny's for a little while, and then head for the woods. We arrived at our parking spot at the edge of the woods where we usually went about 2 hours before light. We had to be there so early because my brother always picked a spot to sit that was as far away as possible, which was usually a few miles. So we start walking, and after coming upon my spot, he heads off to his. After a short nap, I awaken just in time to see the sun coming up. A couple hours go by, and I decide that I have had enough of freezing my arse off, and I return to the truck and wait for my brother. After a while, I spot him off in the distance, and notice that something doesn't quite look right. As he gets closer, I notice that the hood of his snowmobile suit is missing. When he finally reaches the truck, I ask him what happened to his hood. This is what he told me happened............He had made it about half way out to his spot, when suddenly the urge to "GO" got the best of him. He looked around for the perfect spot to "GO", and spotted a small pine tree that was leaned way over, and looked like the perfect place to "GO". He then unzipped his snowmobile suit & pants, pulled them down, and "Went". After he was finished taking care of business, he got all his clothes pulled up & zipped up, and went on his way. After a few moments, he noticed that there was this "Smell" following him, but he didn't think much of it & figured some distance would cure that problem. After about a mile, he thought that maybe he stepped in his "Stuff", and decided to check his boots.....nothing. So he decided to check his snowmobile suite, and unzipped it, pulled it down, took a good look, and discovered that he..........pooped in the hood & had been walking through the woods with it!

True story

 

[ivan salis]

nasty --well at least he didn't try to pull his hood on -- Ivan

 

[stoney56]

ROFL. Whole new meaning to packing it in and packing it out.

 

[Old Dog]

ROFL Paul,

That is a good story.!!
thanks, I can always use a good chuckle.

OD

 

[Ratman]

Reminds me of the time detecting/camping when one of my buddys had a little to much to drink that night and passed out on the ground . We draged him back to his tent and tucked him in so he wouldn't hurt himself . But next morning I noticed his tent in shambles and it looked like some wild animal had tore his tent to shreds . So I stuck my head in the hole of the side of his tent and asked him what the hell happened are you ok ? He said yeah Im fine . It's just that I had to take a dump in the middle of the night and I couldn't get the zipper open on my tent , so I took my machete and hacked my way out ! I still give him a hard time about it ....

 

[Evolution]

Reminds me of the time detecting/camping when one of my buddys had a little to much to drink that night and passed out on the ground . We draged him back to his tent and tucked him in so he wouldn't hurt himself . But next morning I noticed his tent in shambles and it looked like some wild animal had tore his tent to shreds . So I stuck my head in the hole of the side of his tent and asked him what the hell happened are you ok ? He said yeah Im fine . It's just that I had to take a dump in the middle of the night and I couldn't get the zipper open on my tent , so I took my machete and hacked my way out ! I still give him a hard time about it ....

ROFLMAO!!!!! Sounds like something my brother would do.

 

[kim_in_socal]

ROFL!!
You guys have the best stories!

I lived in Europe for several years, most of our weekends were spent downtown, us girls learned which bars had the cleanest bathrooms, while the boys, well, they just went to 'piss alley' and if you were partying out in the woods, just grab a pal and go cop a squat. The friend was there to make sure you didnt fall into your own pee!

 

[Eu_citzen]

Well if I'm going far from "civilization" I'll also take toilet paper with me.
Now a questions to you:
What do you use the shovel fore!? Digging coins? No not here in Sweden here we dig a hole to do our stuff into!
(Just kidding)

regards,
Eu

 

[Bigcypresshunter]

2. Went hunting - walking in the woods, no matter what, makes me have to go to the bathroom. Opening day of buck season. I held it as long as I could (I always carry toilet paper - I have since my kids were small, so that wasn't an issue). Finally, I can't take it anymore, and I leave hubby to "find a private spot". After walking and looking all around, I find the perfect spot - ground is fairly soft, its under a huge tree, there's a stone wall on one side, and a row of short trees on the other - and nobody around. So, I do the deed. I get all fixed up, and walk back over to the hubby - who is laughing. Why? Why are you laughing, I ask. He points in the general direction I had just come from. I look at the big tree I was under - I see nothing. Hubby says - "look up" - there is a hunter in a tree stand, all in orange, standing there. Aaaaarrggh.

Thats funny. I have done the same.

 

[texan connection]

Once I was on I 81 and I pulled my yellow Volkswagon over to pee (I had to go bad) and had been holding it a while, So I stopped did my thing Kinda missed and whiped on my shirt, when I looked up there was this gal, Knowing I was busted I just smiled and waved, she waved back and I left as fast I could.

 

[strike it rich]

Once I was on I 81 and I pulled my yellow Volkswagon over to pee (I had to go bad) and had been holding it a while, So I stopped did my thing Kinda missed and whiped on my shirt, when I looked up there was this gal, Knowing I was busted I just smiled and waved, she waved back and I left as fast I could.

lol

 

[borninok]

Hmmm...reminds me of this one....LOL
--Mel

borninok

 

[borninok]

LOL, Mrs. O....your story reminds me of the time that as a kid...I went up to the stage to receive a Cub Scout award at a special presentation ceremony...and proceeded to vomit all over the Scoutmaster. My parents were absolutely horrified! LOL

--Mel

borninok