All the News that's Unfit-----
(All Headline News) For whatever reason, hot Swedish women are going topless to protest something or other that must be important.
Russian doomsday cult barricades themselves in cave to await imminent end of the world. Guess they heard the new Eagles album too
A man is going to be evicted from his home for playing Buddy Holly songs on his guitar too loudly. Will he stop? "That'll be the day when I die," he says
(KXMB) Man loses hunting privileges when he shoots a moose for biting his sister
Psychlogists say that students whose names start with C or D get lower grades than those whose names start with A or B. Sure George, you can blame Iraq on the letter G
Woman sees Jesus and Mary in a pancake but decides that putting it on a rabbit's head would be blasphemous
man robs store. News: shoots himself in the hip while fleeing. Fark: also loses his pants. Florida pants trifecta now in play.
Drunk woman said she was just "being silly" when she jumped on the tracks and tried to stop a freight train. Train was also in silly mood, so only sent her flying 30 feet and suffer some head injuries and broken leg
Tropical fish have evolved to live out of water for months on time in order to attend church and play lawn darts with Jesus
Erratic driver impatiently explains to police his pants are unzipped because he's getting some, has no "time for this (expletive),” and is "heading home for more." Female passenger would like to go home now
Possible orangutan on the loose. Or a bigfoot. Could be a skunkape. Cat? Maybe it’s a spidermonkey. It could be a raccoon. Well, we don’t really know what it is but we bet it likes doughnuts
Today's nine-hour SWAT siege of an unoccupied building brought to you by Austin, Texas
From the interesting facts department: In WA the legal age for lesbian sex is 16, also if you are interested, the article contains the usual teacher/student affair allegations
''I don't want to incriminate myself, but that was some good fire weed in the car,'' Troy McClean told police
Rejoice citizens - UK to extend baggage screening hell to ports and railways, require new buildings to be terror-proof, install even more cameras. Freedom Is Slavery
TSA screeners fail to detect liquid explosive and detonators in test but were able to successfully confiscate a bottle of water and some shampoo
British Prime Minister wants internet companies to do more to "fight terror". "Fight terror" apparently being a euphemism for blocking things he doesn't agree with
SWAT teams brings guns into Hooters for a night of fun with the waitresses. Luckily someone had a camera
Disney would appreciate it if people would stop spreading the ashes of loved ones around their parks
Australians named worst emitters. It's all that Vegemite
(All Headline News) For whatever reason, hot Swedish women are going topless to protest something or other that must be important.
Russian doomsday cult barricades themselves in cave to await imminent end of the world. Guess they heard the new Eagles album too
A man is going to be evicted from his home for playing Buddy Holly songs on his guitar too loudly. Will he stop? "That'll be the day when I die," he says
(KXMB) Man loses hunting privileges when he shoots a moose for biting his sister
Psychlogists say that students whose names start with C or D get lower grades than those whose names start with A or B. Sure George, you can blame Iraq on the letter G
Woman sees Jesus and Mary in a pancake but decides that putting it on a rabbit's head would be blasphemous
man robs store. News: shoots himself in the hip while fleeing. Fark: also loses his pants. Florida pants trifecta now in play.
Drunk woman said she was just "being silly" when she jumped on the tracks and tried to stop a freight train. Train was also in silly mood, so only sent her flying 30 feet and suffer some head injuries and broken leg
Tropical fish have evolved to live out of water for months on time in order to attend church and play lawn darts with Jesus
Erratic driver impatiently explains to police his pants are unzipped because he's getting some, has no "time for this (expletive),” and is "heading home for more." Female passenger would like to go home now
Possible orangutan on the loose. Or a bigfoot. Could be a skunkape. Cat? Maybe it’s a spidermonkey. It could be a raccoon. Well, we don’t really know what it is but we bet it likes doughnuts
Today's nine-hour SWAT siege of an unoccupied building brought to you by Austin, Texas
From the interesting facts department: In WA the legal age for lesbian sex is 16, also if you are interested, the article contains the usual teacher/student affair allegations
''I don't want to incriminate myself, but that was some good fire weed in the car,'' Troy McClean told police
Rejoice citizens - UK to extend baggage screening hell to ports and railways, require new buildings to be terror-proof, install even more cameras. Freedom Is Slavery
TSA screeners fail to detect liquid explosive and detonators in test but were able to successfully confiscate a bottle of water and some shampoo
British Prime Minister wants internet companies to do more to "fight terror". "Fight terror" apparently being a euphemism for blocking things he doesn't agree with
SWAT teams brings guns into Hooters for a night of fun with the waitresses. Luckily someone had a camera
Disney would appreciate it if people would stop spreading the ashes of loved ones around their parks
Australians named worst emitters. It's all that Vegemite
