And now the anti hunters know...

DirtyHowi

Full Member
Oct 6, 2006
138
33
somewhere in the middle of nowhere iowa
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Garrett ACE 250 Thank You Santa :)
Primary Interest:
All Treasure Hunting
my step mother sent this to me...pity pops wasn't involved...i could see that..


A learning experience.

Names have been removed to protect the stupid!
Actual letter from someone who
writes, hunts and farms.

I had this idea that I was going to rope a deer, put it in a
stall, feed it up on corn for a couple of weeks,
then kill it and eat it.

The first step in this adventure was getting a deer. I figured
that, since they congregate at my cattle feeder and do not
seem to have much fear of me when we are there (a bold
one will sometimes come right up and sniff at the bags
of feed while I am in the back of the truck not 4 feet
away), it should not be difficult to rope one, get up
to it and toss a bag over its head (to calm it down)
then hog tie it and transport it home.

I filled the cattle feeder then hid down at the end with my
rope. The cattle, having seen the roping thing before,
stayed well back. They were not having any of it.

After about 20 minutes, my deer showed up -- 3 of them.
I picked out a likely looking one, stepped out from the
end of the feeder, and threw my rope. The deer just
stood there and stared at me. I wrapped the rope
around my waist and twisted the end so I
would have a good hold.

The deer still just stood and stared at me, but you could
tell it was mildly concerned about the whole rope
situation. I took a step towards it ... it took a
step away. I put a little tension on the rope
and then received an education.

The first thing that I learned is that, while a deer may just
stand there looking at you funny while you rope it, they
are spurred to action when you start pulling on that
rope. That deer EXPLODED.

The second thing I learned is that pound for pound, a deer
is a LOT stronger than a cow or a colt. A cow or a colt in
that weight range I could fight down with a rope and
with some dignity. A deer -- no chance.

That thing ran and bucked and twisted and pulled. There
was no controlling it and certainly no getting close to it.
As it jerked me off my feet and started dragging me
across the ground, it occurred to me that having a
deer on a rope was not nearly as good an idea as
I had originally imagined.

The only upside is that they do not have as much stamina
as many other animals.

A brief 10 minutes later, it was tired and not nearly as quick
to jerk me off my feet and drag me when I managed to get
up. It took me a few minutes to realize this, since I was
mostly blinded by the blood flowing out of the big
gash in my head. At that point, I had lost my
taste for corn-fed venison. I just wanted
to get that devil creature off the
end of that rope.

I figured if I just let it go with the rope hanging around its
neck, it would likely die slow and painfully somewhere.
At the time, there was no love at all between me and
that deer. At that moment, I hated the thing, and I
would venture a guess that the feeling was mutual.

Despite the gash in my head and the several large knots
where I had cleverly arrested the deer's momentum by
bracing my head against various large rocks as it
dragged me across the ground, I could still
think clearly enough to recognize that
there was a small chance that I
shared some tiny amount of
responsibility for the
situation we were in,
so I didn't want the
deer to have it
suffer a slow
death,

so I managed to get it lined back up in between my truck
and the feeder - a little trap I had set before hand ...
kind of like a squeeze chute. I got it to back in
there and I started moving up so I could get
my rope back.

Did you know that deer bite? They do! I never in a million
years would have thought that a deer would bite
somebody, so I was very surprised when I
reached up there to grab that rope and
the deer grabbed hold of my wrist.

Now, when a deer bites you, it is not like being bit by a horse
where they just bite you and then let go. A deer bites you
and shakes its head -- almost like a pit bull. They bite
HARD and it hurts. The proper thing to do when a
deer bites you is probably to freeze and draw
back slowly. I tried screaming and shaking
instead. My method was ineffective.

It seems like the deer was biting and shaking for several
minutes, but it was likely only several seconds. I, being
smarter than a deer (though you may be questioning
that claim by now) tricked it. While I kept it busy
tearing the bejesus out of my right arm, I
reached up with my left hand and
pulled that rope loose.

That was when I got my final lesson in deer behavior for
the day. Deer will strike at you with their front feet.
They rear right up on their back feet and strike
right about head and shoulder level, and their
hooves are surprisingly sharp. I learned a
long time ago that, when an animal --
like a horse -- strikes at you with
their hooves and you can't get
away easily, the best thing
to do is try to make a
loud noise and make
an aggressive move
towards the
animal.

This will usually cause them to back down a bit so you can
escape. This was not a horse. This was a deer, so obviously,
such trickery would not work. In the course of a
millisecond, I devised a different strategy. I
screamed like a woman and tried to turn
and run.

The reason I had always been told NOT to try to turn and
run from a horse that paws at you is that there is a good
chance that it will hit you in the back of the head. Deer
may not be so different from horses after all, besides
being twice as strong and 3 times as evil, because
the second I turned to run, it hit me right in the
back of the head and knocked me down.

Now, when a deer paws at you and knocks you down, it
does not immediately leave. I suspect it does not
recognize that the danger has passed. What they
do instead is paw your back and jump up and
down on you while you are laying there
crying like a little girl and covering
your head.

I finally managed to crawl under the truck and the deer
went away. So now I know why when people go deer
hunting they bring a rifle with a scope so that they
can be somewhat equal to the Prey.
 

Tubecity

Bronze Member
Mar 11, 2007
1,000
12
sw Pa.
That's hilarious, it must have taken me 10 minutes to read it cause
I was laughing so hard. Even the wife & kids came over to see what
was wrong with me. Best laugh I had in quite a while. Thanks.
 

strickman

Bronze Member
Jan 27, 2008
1,865
115
Villa Rica georgia
Detector(s) used
gold bug pro,garret,whites,tesoro,bounty-hunter,,.....
Primary Interest:
All Treasure Hunting
oh $iht ! i'm crying!!!! i would have paid to see it,then again probably best i didn't i might have peed on myself l.o.l.
 

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