Shooting from the hip

[spartacus53]

As I have mentioned in the past, I am quick of wit, and not one to mince words. There are times I have a bad habit of speaking my mind, without thinking.

This actually happened a good time ago when I had to go to court regarding child support. This was about 2 years after 9/11, because the company I had worked for closed down and my unemployment at the time was six months. In order to get by had to close my 401K, so in essence I was living off my savings. I had to stand in front of some sort of moderator, to explain why I wasn't making the full payment. I went on to explain my situation, that I had no income and a high rent to cover. I went on to tell her that "I had to close my 401K", so I could get by. Her next question was, "So how much do you have left in your 401K"? Well that kind of ticked me off, so I replied "What about closed don't you understand"? One of the court officers just lowered his head shaking it back and forth. The moderator then said, well you can now go tell that to a judge. Now I am really fuming so I said, No problem, I think she'll understand English. When I left the room, the officer was behind me and offered a bit of advice, "Whatever you do don't say that in front of a judge". I told him no problem, if she is sitting on the bench, I think she'll understand me.

You know what? She did

Maybe I did come off a bit rough, but that was only after her not understanding simple English. As far as I could tell that woman was born and raised in the US, so what was her problem in understanding the word CLOSED? When I speak clearly I do get annoyed at people that can't grasp our language, especially in this type of situation. If I knew English was not her native language, I would have reworded it for her with no problem.


I know at times I need to put a muzzle on my mouth, but sometimes you just can't teach an old dog new tricks

 

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[truckinbutch]

Shooting from the lip can also have devastating consequences . I was datin a young lawyer's daughter in highschool until the evening that he pulled me to the side and explained to me that being tied to a 'Dirt Farmer' would be a detriment to his daughter's future and his career .
I never went back .... She went to a fine college where she got into drugs and birthing several
children without benefit of clergy .... While I became a respected businessman in the county and married another gal .
17 years after that man excused me from his home I appeared before him in his new position
as Circuit Judge presiding over my divorce hearing . First thing out of my ignorant mouth was
"Hi , Judge , how's your daughter doing these days ?"
He so appreciated my conscerne that his adverse rulings over the next several years cost me a
quarter of a million dollars that I might not have handed out had I kept my mouth shut on the
getgo .

 

[ivan salis]

some times the mouth overloads the brains ability to stop it from spewing fecal matter all over oneself.

its often painful when that occurs --as one ages one tends to learn not to do that , as a general rule.

but at times one can not seem to help ones self.

 

[lonesomebob]

and as one ages,one tends to speak his mind, reuse to take quietly the inflated opinions of others, who think that they have some powerful opinion. that is the time to dig in and inform them that one is too damn old to listen to their opinions of ones behavior and very existence, and have outlived as.. .oles such as them,and will continue to carry on. I got thrown out ,but I considered it an honor to be so. Bob Former cop Grandfather and public servant

 

[spartacus53]

I appreciate your thoughts and insight. The funny thing about this topic in general is that it seems both sides of the argument have valid point. I can't disagree with anything any of you said.

Ivan point is where I am striving to be today. I try and hold my tongue before saying anything that can be vile, rude, or put me into a bad light. Then again with the other side of the coin both Butch & Bob also seem to share my cursed trait.

For the most part I am a law abiding citizen, OK, so once in a while I am go 10-20 mph over the speed limit, but this is NJ and the roads are nuts. Thank god for the most part when I say something too quickly it is on the joking side, sometimes it is said to make a point and say what others really want to say. I'll post another scenario and you can tell me.

I really think this can be an interesting topic as the way I see it, both sides are 100% right, if that makes any sense.

 

[Mighty AP]

LOL I think we all have those precious lil' moments, some more than others. I, like Spartacus am usualy trying to be funny & quick when I say that really stupid thing. But not always. I was moving furniture for United Van Lines many years ago, we had just arived for a very long move, we were meeting the shippers. The wife was (I thought) wearing a maternity top so I said "congratulations on your pregnancy. How far along are you?" She glared at me & before stomping away told me she was not pregnant! DOH! That job turned out to be 10-12 hours of hell! Me & my big mouth.

 

[bula]

Never pass up an opportunity to keep your mouth shut. This is a good motto to remember

 

[ivan salis]

Ivan's 4 rules of speaking your mind
#1 engage brain BEFORE operating mouth --
#2 remember words like bullets can not be recalled and can hurt ( both others and yourself or cause at times)-- once your mouth is fired off , like a gun its too late to think I should not have "pulled the trigger."
#3 remember always better to have folks think your a fool --then to open ones mouth and prove it to them.
#4 however if one must "speak ones mind" be sure your in the right , that what you say is true and that its not being said in a mean spirited or hostile way without just cause , and let the chips fall where they may.

 

[spartacus53]

Shooting from the lip can also have devastating consequences . I was datin a young lawyer's daughter in highschool until the evening that he pulled me to the side and explained to me that being tied to a 'Dirt Farmer' would be a detriment to his daughter's future and his career .
I never went back .... She went to a fine college where she got into drugs and birthing several
children without benefit of clergy .... While I became a respected businessman in the county and married another gal .
17 years after that man excused me from his home I appeared before him in his new position
as Circuit Judge presiding over my divorce hearing . First thing out of my --deleted-- mouth was
"Hi , Judge , how's your daughter doing these days ?"
He so appreciated my conscerne that his adverse rulings over the next several years cost me a
quarter of a million dollars that I might not have handed out had I kept my mouth shut on the
getgo .

I feel for you there, but in all honesty, that judge should have removed himself from your hearing. You could have also demanded another judge.

 

[ivan salis]

I would have asked for a differant judge right away -- since you had "bad" past "personal" history , you would have been totally justified to ask for it. --with your past experance with him do you think he could be "unbiased?" --get real.

 

[truckinbutch]

The world here was a different place at that time . It took quite a while before I could file an affadavit
of prejudice and get my case moved to another jurisdiction .
Once I got our case moved to a less predjudicial district my 4 children filed for a change of custody .
They prevailed in their plea and I became the first father in my county to regain custody of his child-
ren as well as being awarded child support .
Since then I have seen 3 of the 4 graduate college and embark on lucrative careers . The other one
is well established as a commercial electrician . They are providing us with lots of grandkids and a sense of pride in a job well done .

 

[RGINN]

I fought Department of Her Services for over 10 years over child support in Oklahoma. They outright told me they didn't care about me as I was a man. They used to run a feature in the paper about 'Deadbeat Dads'. Never a word about 'Deadbeat Moms'. I always kept my paid and managed to give the kids a little extra on the side. I admire your restraint, Spartacus. Truckinbutch, you're remarkable. That would have never happened under the administration we had in Oklahoma. (Kids belongs with they momma!) I say many things and sometimes it is intentionally to provoke, as you learn a lot from some folks through confrontation. I can usually back up any 'threats' I might make, but my best rule I try to remember is 'Don't let your mouth write a check your a** can't cash'. And beware of guys that are drunk but fight sober.