Please exchange excuses here

[spartacus53]

I know that at times many of us need excuses to explain ourselves for for a myriad of reasons. The reason I am running this post is so that I can compile a vast amount of excuses and have one place to go and look for one that may fit a future situation and also give me quick access.

Although I do have tons of ones I have used over the years, I am looking for new and fresh ideas so I hope that you can contribute something.

So, this is not a joke and I hope to hear your excuses too! Oh, please also use the situation the excuse is used in too...

I'll kick it off, and this is one I have actually used Then again, coming from me, anything is possible and people just know it

The situation: Being invited to a party I didn't really want to attend

"Sorry, but I can't attend because I have to wash my cat. I don't have a cat yet, but I am planning on getting one and I know he is going to be dirty".


Please also keep in mind that this is not only to get out of attending any function, but for being late, or asked to help someone move. This is for anything you may face!!!

I look forward to your suggestions... Thanks i

[jeff of pa]

I Take it your being asked Face to Face ?

because No answer is the best answer
if asked via EMail or Card

Face to face,

"I'll have to check My Schedule"

then just Forget.

on the Phone

"Ahh ! I'll have to check, I think
there is something else that day.
Can't get to my Calendar right now"

then Forget

Right Now ?

Sorry ! Realy not in the mood Right Now

[shaun7]

One I use is "you should let me do it more often"

[spartacus53]

Yes, all circumstances are face to face.

As for e-mail, I just say it went to my spam file and I never saw it

The phone - I already use that I couldn't call you back because the #1 on my phone is broken

[jeff of pa]

Yes, all circumstances are face to face.



The phone - I already use that I couldn't call you back because the #1 on my phone is broken

at My age "I Forgot" Works

& Is usually The Truth.

[stefen]

Sorry, I'm scheduled to sort my sock drawer that day

[bigwater]

For missing a party,
"Sure, I'll be there... thanks for the invite."
The day after the party,
"Man, I was on my way and a kid on a bicycle shot out in front of me and I tapped him before I could get stopped. Didn't hurt the kid, but by the time I got done dealing with the cops, I was so bummed out I just went back home."
-or-
"My stepson called just as I was getting ready to leave to come over and he was broke down in (30 minutes away). By the time I got done helping him out of the jam it was just too late for me to make it."

Vehicle excuses are always good... after the fact. Use your imagination.

For helping someone move? "You ain't got enough money *OR* beer to get me to help you move. Call Mayflower. That's what I do."

[spartacus53]

Bigwater Loved that 1st one... Now that's what I'm talking about

[truckinbutch]

Being late is a direct result of me formerly being a staunch proponent of split-tail bottom long underwear .
I am now reformed and will wear only the button flap version .
Fox got in my henhouse last night and I sneaked out to the barnyard barefoot , in my split bottoms with my double barrel 12 gauge . Hunkered down and got a bead on the fox . Just as I was about to give him a barrel my dog came up behind me and 'cold nosed' that split .
We been up pickin chickens since 1 o'clock this morning .

[vibes]

"This is not my energy to embrace"

How can ya argue/disrespect with that logic?

[curbdiggercarl57]

1. I thought you meant next Monday!
2. Que?
3. I didn't hear the alarm going off.
4. All my GOOD clothes were in the wash.
5. I can't go, my ex-girlfriend plans to show up.
6. Any excuse Belushi used in "The Blues Brothers".

[vibes]

1. I thought you meant next Monday!
2. Que?
3. I didn't hear the alarm going off.
4. All my GOOD clothes were in the wash.
5. I can't go, my ex-girlfriend plans to show up.
6. Any excuse Belushi used in "The Blues Brothers".

Especially if it involves Lower Wacker Dr.

[Mark S.]

Can't make it. I have to wash my hair.


P.S. My wife left on a school trip early this morning. Gone for three days.. She said not to stack the sink full of dishes while she was gone. So I ask her which countertop she wanted us to stack them on?

Even though she has a good sense of humor I still got smacked and called a jerk.

[curbdiggercarl57]

1. I thought you meant next Monday!
2. Que?
3. I didn't hear the alarm going off.
4. All my GOOD clothes were in the wash.
5. I can't go, my ex-girlfriend plans to show up.
6. Any excuse Belushi used in "The Blues Brothers".

Especially if it involves Lower Wacker Dr.

Never driven through there.
Imagine it's kinda like cruising through the Rubber Room, though safer.
How the Hell are ya, V?
Getting out in the dirt?
Carl

[spartacus53]

Here is one more for you even though it may be in bad taste, nope it is in bad taste. I know for a fact that you would have to be a man to see any humor in it at all.

Sorry I can't make it. I have to go out and get wheels for my wife's miscarriage.