Bens Bully Busters

[squiggy]

Thanks Coily for your thoughts! I always enjoy hearing from you...
Its to bad some people are allowed to behave that way..and they know who they are!!!

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[pat-tekker-cat]

It seems, imho, that these children are emulating adult examples.
In the adult world, it is the aggressive, the ruthless, the strongest, that can over run the weak, get their way, and prosper at the expense and degradation of others. Their are rewards, often monetarily and in status and power, that re-enforces this type behavior in adults and children are just copying, what they see works for others.

It's sad any of us, were ever bullied as children. It's even sadder, the adult bullies that continue this behavior.
JB, I hope you are felling better, pls do take good care of yourself. Great thread.

 

[diggummup]

I think many of you have already "read between the lines" but the whole point of this thread was actually due to online bullying. Bullies never grow up, IMO.

Coily, while you and I may disagree on certain political issues, you are a person and no one deserves to be bullied, no matter what. Thank you for speaking up.

I understood, I just leaned towards the child bullying, be it online or in person, because I believe it is a bigger issue in today's society. The story that Crispin pasted was big news down here last week even though it happened last month. That was just the latest incident of a child committing suicide because of bullying. I could care less what anyone on here thinks or says for that matter. I'm an adult and online bullies don't bother me. Children, on the other hand are a different story.

PS- I also wouldn't let my 12 year old daughter (if I had one) walk to school alone. Unfortunately there are way too many sexual predators out there nowadays. Don't believe it? Look up your neighborhood and see-
United States Department of Justice National Sex Offender Public Website and these are just the registered/previously convicted ones.

PPS- stick around coilygirl, some of us like you, just stay out of the 2nd amendment forum! lol

 

[Chadeaux]

All sexual predators are bullies, that's how they get away as long as they do.

 

[bill from lachine]

Crispin,

Sorry about the bullying you had to contend with growing up.....luckily I didn't have to contend with it much being mostly the class clown....mind you like the song from Tom Petty I wasn't one to back down when I had to defend myself..lol.

That finger with the scar was when I had to punch up since the bully was that much taller and it came in contact with a
very stubborn tooth....lol....he never tried again though.

When I was in the 9th grade I witnessed a sickening event in the locker room. A bully was always making fun of somebody who was mentally handicapped and didn't have the intelligence to let it go or defend himself verbally. One day the bully got real brave and picked a fight with him after gym class. Problem was, this handicapped kid could fight and starting whooping on him. Within seconds the bully's friends jumped on the poor kid and got him on the ground. From there on out they just took turns beating on him while he was on the ground. Nobody said a word...nobody got in trouble.

I weighed 120lbs at the time. I regret not having the courage to intervene; however, at that stage of my life I would have been a wisp of air and target for their rage. I was bullied constantly my whole childhood. I was persecuted for a religion that was not mine. You people can clamor on all you want about standing up to bullies and not needing to do anything about it. Standing up to one bully is easy. Try fighting ten off at one time. Maybe I should have brought a gun to school....

And Bill, a six year old girl walking herself to school is bait for sexual predators. Same thing for the 12y.o. There are sick sexual predators that live right next to you and you don't even know it. Spend a day with me, hear the stories, know the truth...

 

[CoilyGirl]

I think many of you have already "read between the lines" but the whole point of this thread was actually due to online bullying. Bullies never grow up, IMO.

Coily, while you and I may disagree on certain political issues, you are a person and no one deserves to be bullied, no matter what. Thank you for speaking up.

I got where you were coming from Ben and you are right,nobody deserves to be bullied.Allowing bullying on this site and looking the other way to me is pretty much participating in it yourself but that just my humble opinion of course.Dang Bill,I thought that was a nub at first!

 

[TheRingFinder]

Bully's are punks period. That said - the problem now is, as always, the powers that be have gone too far. Everything is now BULLYING.

 

[bill from lachine]

CoilyGirl,

LOL......I seem to recall on another thread that you were pretty good at throwing stilettos around.

Regards + HH

Bill

I got where you were coming from Ben and you are right,nobody deserves to be bullied.Allowing bullying on this site and looking the other way to me is pretty much participating in it yourself but that just my humble opinion of course.Dang Bill,I thought that was a nub at first!

 

[Treasure_Hunter]

If this thread continues to attack this site it will be locked.

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[TheRingFinder]

JB - Got a question for you -

So, I am a True Christian. I am offended by the promotion of homosexuality in our Country, in our Schools, in movies, TV, work places etc. The promotion of this behavoir makes me sick.

Am I the bully, or are the groups that are forcing the people in America to accept and promote this behavior the bully's?

Thanks!

 

[jerseyben]

JB - Got a question for you -

So, I am a True Christian. I am offended by the promotion of homosexuality in our Country, in our Schools, in movies, TV, work places etc. The promotion of this behavoir makes me sick.

Am I the bully, or are the groups that are forcing the people in America to accept and promote this behavior the bully's?

Thanks!

As I really want to keep this thread unlocked and open - I would kindly and respectfully ask you to keep that sort of discussion out of my thread.

I ask others not to respond either, please.

Thank you.

 

[jerseyben]

Bully's are punks period. That said - the problem now is, as always, the powers that be have gone too far. Everything is now BULLYING.

Disagree.

"Everything" is most certainly not bullying. There is a fine line. If you were ever bullied in your life, then surely you will know the difference.

 

[DizzyDigger]

"Bullies" exist in almost every mammal species, be it human or African Lion.
Why? I have no idea, but if you study humans and enough critters, you'll
see where one critter tries to bully the rest. I have a cat that's a complete
arse..he takes every opportunity to bully any other cat around...but, if another
cat dares to challenge him to a fight he turns tail and runs.

Bullies today are encouraged by what they see on TV and in video games, and
until someone stands up to them they'll continue to bully others. None of the
"Dr. Spock" types of punishment will change a thing...but lock that bully in a room
with someone of the same age who is more mature, capable and intolerant of
their crap, and odds are that "bully" will be changing their attitude in short order.

This is Mother Nature's "Bully Cure", and has almost a 100% success rate.

Internet bullies are an entirely different problem than the "in-person" bullies, as
there is really no way to straighten them out. Sure, they can be banned but then
they simply go find another forum to harass. Ignore them, report them or just
don't acknowledge them. If you do need to reply to them, let them know you're
on to their schtick..as is everyone else. Sometimes I think they (bullies) really
do want to be part of a forum, but lack the skills to communicate at a common
level. This could well be due to the environment they were raised in and how
they were treated growing up.

An old saying rings true ...."Don't look like prey, and you won't be prey."

Had a fellow in high school that was a bully as a kid...at least till we locked horns
one day. After I thumped him good (and got a busted nose myself), I sat down
with the guy and basically explained to him that his current attitude and abuse of
others would get him nowhere in life, and would only serve to make his life miserable.
After a few days he came back and apologized to me for acting as he did, and after
that we became friends, Believe it or not, he ended up as a very counselor that
helps kids with anger issues.

 

[squiggy]

Good example dizzyd! Not that I like a bully in any way, but I do believe they to are wounded miserable individuals. Sometimes bullys are being mistreated at home and act it out on others.

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[TheRingFinder]

As I really want to keep this thread unlocked and open - I would kindly and respectfully ask you to keep that sort of discussion out of my thread.

I ask others not to respond either, please.

Thank you.

Sorry to tell you JB, but the huge anti-bullying measures being adopted by the mass media is directly related to the topic. Like or not, it's the fact.

 

[Treasure_Hunter]

Please keep politics out of thread.....

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[DizzyDigger]

Got to thinking a bit more about this issue of bullies, and how to best deal with them.

What I've said in earlier posts is absolutely valid, as a person has every right
to protect themselves from physical harm. Now, some folks can defend themselves,
and others can't due to size, physical strength, or lack of any self-defense training.
Having someone else kick the bullies arse for you is not an option, as the next time that
same bully catches you alone you're gonna get thumped.

So, when we do successfully defend ourselves there needs to be some effort
made in the next few days to [safely] communicate with the bully. Why? To let them
know that you were only defending yourself, from them. Once the bully knows that
you no longer fear them, there may be opportunities where they'll talk about "why" they
feel the need to bully others. You're likely to get a lot of different answers before the truth
finally comes out (and that's OK, be patient, but persistent over time). Could be because at
home they are constantly bullied , either by older siblings or, in some cases, by the parents
themselves.

Met several former-bullies that all had about the same story; they didn't know how to
fit in any other way, and generally have -0- self-esteem. Helping them get involved in a school
activity is a great way for them to learn that it's OK to be themselves, and that "bully"
attitude will soon begin to fade.

Guess what I'm sayin' is that ya gotta show 'em that there's a much better, more
pleasant way to live than being nasty all the time. We can make differences in other
peoples lives, but to do so we have to be willing to extend a hand, and step up to the task.

And yes, that's what counselors are for. If more people today weren't so into their own
little worlds, and instead stepped out to help one another then there wouldn't be such
a need for so many counselors, and probably a lot more empty cells in the prisons.

 

[squiggy]

I agree with all you just said! The counseling part is a little more complicated. The most damaged need professional help! Its all a matter of degrees!

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[TheRingFinder]

Disagree.

"Everything" is most certainly not bullying. There is a fine line. If you were ever bullied in your life, then surely you will know the difference.

I was bullied in Highschool. I had to go to my rival highschool in 9th grade because my zip code. I dated some of "their" girls in middle school and when I showed up at the highschool, I was instantly a hated kid by the boys. I was pushed around and made fun of for a couple months. When I had enough, I was walking down the hall and one kid "who was with a bunch of girls" beeotch slapped me in the head. I turned around and grabbed him by the neck and we went at it until a teacher broke it up. After that, no one ever picked on me again. I was 130 pounds in highschool, a very shinny kid. Sometimes, no matter how hard it is - you have to stick up for yourself. I teach my kids that.

There will ALWAYS be bully's - Now let's teach our kids to stand up and learn to be self reliant. < - - - That is what works best!!!

 

[bill from lachine]

Yep sometimes you have to push back......I did it a few times when I was a kid and like you pretty scrawny.....once they
knew I wouldn't stand for it they backed off....heck I even chased a bigger kid all the way home with a snow shovel after he gave me thumping for no good reason.....he never did it again.....lol.

Regards + HH

Bill

I was bullied in Highschool. I had to go to my rival highschool in 9th grade because my zip code. I dated some of "their" girls in middle school and when I showed up at the highschool, I was instantly a hated kid by the boys. I was pushed around and made fun of for a couple months. When I had enough, I was walking down the hall and one kid "who was with a bunch of girls" beeotch slapped me in the head. I turned around and grabbed him by the neck and we went at it until a teacher broke it up. After that, no one ever picked on me again. I was 130 pounds in highschool, a very shinny kid. Sometimes, no matter how hard it is - you have to stick up for yourself. I teach my kids that.

There will ALWAYS be bully's - Now let's teach our kids to stand up and learn to be self reliant. < - - - That is what works best!!!