Must read obituary
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  1. #1

    Mar 2008
    CT
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    Must read obituary

    An Obituary printed in the London Times.....Absolutely Dead Brilliant!!

    Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been
    with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth
    records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as
    having cultivated such valuable lessons as:

    - Knowing when to come in out of the rain;
    - Why the early bird gets the worm;
    - Life isn't always fair;
    - And maybe it was my fault.

    Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn)
    and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).

    His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set
    in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate;
    teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding
    an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

    Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they
    themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.

    It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer
    sun lotion or an aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became
    pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

    Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses;
    and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

    Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home
    and the burglar could sue you for assault.

    Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee
    was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

    Common Sense was preceded in death,
    -by his parents, Truth and Trust,
    -by his wife, Discretion,
    -by his daughter, Responsibility,
    -and by his son, Reason.

    He is survived by his 5 stepbrothers;
    - I Know My Rights
    - I Want It Now
    - Someone Else Is To Blame
    - I'm A Victim
    - Pay me for Doing Nothing

    Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.

    If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.
    pat-tekker-cat and Goose-0 like this.

  2. #2
    us
    Dec 2006
    Central Minnnesota
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    And most people don't realize he is gone......or care.

  3. #3
    us
    Pesc

    Mar 2007
    Texas Hill Country
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    I miss him !!! I work in an alternative school and mourn for him daily.
    Quest Pro, Tesoro Amigo II, Lesche digging tools. Oldest US Coin 1853 Seated Liberty Quarter.
    www.youtube.com/user/pescadoremetaldetect
    www.facebook.com/pescadoremetaldetecting

 

 

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