Must read obituary

lisfisher

Hero Member
Mar 5, 2008
573
1,026
CT
🥇 Banner finds
2
Detector(s) used
Minelab Safari
Minelab Excalibur 2
White's classic 3sl
Garrett Infinium
Garrett pro pointer AT
Primary Interest:
All Treasure Hunting
An Obituary printed in the London Times.....Absolutely Dead Brilliant!!

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been
with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth
records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as
having cultivated such valuable lessons as:

- Knowing when to come in out of the rain;
- Why the early bird gets the worm;
- Life isn't always fair;
- And maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn)
and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).

His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set
in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate;
teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding
an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they
themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.

It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer
sun lotion or an aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became
pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses;
and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home
and the burglar could sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee
was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death,
-by his parents, Truth and Trust,
-by his wife, Discretion,
-by his daughter, Responsibility,
-and by his son, Reason.

He is survived by his 5 stepbrothers;
- I Know My Rights
- I Want It Now
- Someone Else Is To Blame
- I'm A Victim
- Pay me for Doing Nothing

Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.

If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.
 

pescadore

Hero Member
Mar 4, 2007
736
425
Schertz, TX
Detector(s) used
Nokta Simplex+
Primary Interest:
Metal Detecting
I miss him !!! I work in an alternative school and mourn for him daily.
 

Top Member Reactions

Users who are viewing this thread

Top