6 reasons to think first
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Thread: 6 reasons to think first

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  1. #1
    us
    Wheres The Gold

    Feb 2010
    Vancouver WA
    Chug)Whites Classic 5 ID, (Red Whites Coin master Pro) Chug and Reds New Additions Give It Up>> Garrett's AT Pro Buttercup>> Garrett's Ace 250 Show Me the Money>> Garrets Ace 400
    7,392
    2632 times
    Metal Detecting
    Honorable Mentions (1)

    6 reasons to think first

    Here are six reasons why you should think
    before you speak -the last one is great
    Have you ever spoken and wished that
    you could immediately take the words back...
    Here are the Testimonials of a few people who did....






    FIRST TESTIMONY:
    I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three
    kids in tow and asked loudly,
    'How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?'

    I turned around and walked back out and never went back
    My husband didn't say a word...he knew better.





    SECOND TESTIMONY:
    I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls.

    I was unhappy with the women's type I had been using.
    After browsing for several minutes, I was approached by
    one of the good-looking gentlemen who works at the store.
    He asked if he could help me.
    Without thinking, I looked at him and said,

    'I think I like playing with men's balls'

    THIRD TESTIMONY:
    My sister and I were at the mall and
    passed by a store that sold a variety of candy and nuts.

    As we were looking at the display case, the boy behind
    the counter asked if we needed any help. I replied, '
    No, I'm just looking at your nuts.'
    My sister started to laugh hysterically.
    The boy grinned, and I turned beet-red and walked away..
    To this day, my sister has never let me forget.


    FOURTH TESTIMONY:
    While in line at the bank one afternoon,
    my toddler decided to release
    some pent-up energy and ran amok.
    I was finally able to grab hold of
    her after receiving looks of disgust
    and annoyance from other patrons.
    I told her that if she did not start behaving
    'right now' she would be punished.
    To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said

    in a voice just as t hreatening,
    'If you don't let me go right now,
    I will tell Grandma that I saw you
    kissing Daddy's pee-pee last night!'

    The silence was deafening after this enlightening

    exchange. Even the tellers stopped what they were doing.
    I mustered up the last of my dignity and walked
    out of the bank with my daughter in tow.
    The last thing I heard when the door closed behind me, were
    screams of laughter.

    FIFTH TESTIMONY:
    Have you ever asked your child a question too many times?
    My three-year-old son had a lot of problems with potty training

    and I was on him constantly. One day we stopped at Taco Bell
    for a quick lunch, in between errands It was very busy,
    with a full dining room. While enjoying my taco,
    I smelled something funny, so of course I checked

    my seven-month-old daughter, she was clean.
    The realized that Danny had not asked to go potty

    in a while.. I asked him if he needed to go,
    and he said 'No' .. I kept thinking
    'Oh Lord, that child has had an accident, and

    I don't have any clothes with me.' Then I said,
    'Danny, are you SURE you didn't have an accident?'
    'No,' he replied.
    I just KNEW that he must have had an accident,

    because the smell was getting worse.
    Soooooo, I asked one more time, 'Danny did you have an accident ?


    This time he jumped up, yanked down his pants,
    bent over, spread his cheeks
    and yelled
    'SEE MOM, IT'S JUST FARTS!!'

    While 30 people nearly choked to death on their tacos laughing,
    he calmly pulled up his pants and sat down.

    An old couple made me feel better, thanking me for the

    best laugh they'd ever had!


    LAST BUT NOT LEAST TESTIMONY:
    This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for 2 days

    and a very embarrassed female news anchor who will,
    in the future, likely think before she speaks. What happens
    when you predict snow but do n't get any! We had a
    female news anchor that, the day after it was supposed
    to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman
    and asked:
    'So Bob, where's that 8 inches you
    promised me last night?'


    Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew

    did too they were laughing so hard!

    Now, didn't that feel good?
    Pass it on to someone you know who needs a laugh
    and remember
    we all say things we don't really mean,
    so think before you speak!!!







    "Good friends are like stars..You don't always see them,
    but you know they are always there.

    Red














    "It cant Always Be Silver Or Gold But It Is A Hell Of an Experience Pulling It Out Of the Dirt"

    Metal detecting is Like A Marathon, Your Running fast then start Slowing A Bit The You Find Something Interesting And You Pick Up the Pace!!! The Only Difference is If You Are Addicted to this Hobby there Is NO FINISH LINE HH Chug And Red

  2. #2
    us
    Wheres The Gold

    Feb 2010
    Vancouver WA
    Chug)Whites Classic 5 ID, (Red Whites Coin master Pro) Chug and Reds New Additions Give It Up>> Garrett's AT Pro Buttercup>> Garrett's Ace 250 Show Me the Money>> Garrets Ace 400
    7,392
    2632 times
    Metal Detecting
    Honorable Mentions (1)
    This ones sure to Get Us Banned!!!! ROTFLMAO Chug
    "It cant Always Be Silver Or Gold But It Is A Hell Of an Experience Pulling It Out Of the Dirt"

    Metal detecting is Like A Marathon, Your Running fast then start Slowing A Bit The You Find Something Interesting And You Pick Up the Pace!!! The Only Difference is If You Are Addicted to this Hobby there Is NO FINISH LINE HH Chug And Red

  3. #3
    us
    Jul 2009
    Whiting, NJ
    Ace 250
    10,503
    1052 times
    All Types Of Treasure Hunting
    They are classic

  4. #4
    us
    Tribal Member of United Houma Nation -

    Sep 2011
    Southeast Arkansas
    Ace 250
    5,328
    6077 times
    Cache Hunting
    Heard them all before . . . except numer 4. All were lots of laughs! Thxs!
    "When under trial, let no one say: 'I am being tried by God.' For with evil things God cannot be tried, nor does he himself try anyone. . . . Do not be misled, my beloved brothers. Every good gift and every perfect present is from above, coming down from the Father of the celestial lights, who does not vary or change like the shifting shadows." --- James 1:13, 16, 17

    A few of my favorite pix: https://www.500px.com/ccjr221

  5. #5
    stefen
    When in High School I worked in a Drug Store when school was out.

    One late afternoon an older gentleman can in and gingerly mounted the Soda Counter stool, and ordered a Banana Fudge Sundae.

    "Crushed nuts", I asked, and he replied, "hemeroids".
    Last edited by stefen; Oct 16, 2012 at 11:02 AM.

  6. #6
    us
    Getter done

    Sep 2007
    Terra Bella, Ca.
    DFX, IDXPro, MXT, Lobo St., At Pro
    856
    558 times
    All Types Of Treasure Hunting
    Well, thanks, you could have warned us, I just peed my pants laughing.
    stefen likes this.
    Remember 9-1-1 and all the Fallen Firefighters and Police Officers. Never forget the price they paid for our Freedom.

    God Bless the men and women past, present, and future who serve this country by serving in the military.

    Only two defining forces have ever offered to die for you, Jesus Christ and the American Solider, one died for your soul the other died for your freedom.

    What a shame that scientists will call a cell on another planet "life", but they won't acknowledge a fetus as life until it is born.

    Integrity is doing the right thing when no one is watching.

 

 

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