Fixing broken words and phrases
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  1. #1
    us
    Mar 2005
    Vegas
    2,679
    288 times
    All Types Of Treasure Hunting

    Fixing broken words and phrases

    Now that we're well into the 21st Century it's high time we fix words that for decades have had awkward spelling. Most of these are due to roots in foreign languages but since they've been inaccurately pronounced for so long, we should simply adopt a new spelling. Some prime candidates for me are:

    SUBPOENA - I recommend something closer to the actual pronunciation, like SUPEENA.

    FEBRUARY - Drop that first R already, no one says it anyway.

    ORANGUTAN - Adding another G at the end not only brings it in line with how every non-scientist pronounces it, but it gives it a much more pleasant, flowing sound.

    MORTGAGE - Get rid of that T. It's no wonder people have difficulty learning English with useless letters like that.

    A LOT - With much regret, I have to recommend that this phrase be combined into the already familiar and heavily-used ALOT. The internet has given it such renewed strength that there's no turning back now.

    NEANDERTHAL - If anthropologists insist on pronouncing the end as TALL then drop that H and add another L. If not, we're saying THAL.

    More?
    Last appearance in pocket change:

    Wheat penny: 1956-D (7/24/19)
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  2. #2
    us
    Oct 2007
    Summit County, CO
    White's DFX, White's Classic 1 Coinmaster, Nokta Pointer
    7,649
    7093 times
    All Types Of Treasure Hunting
    Honorable Mentions (1)

    Re: Fixing broken words and phrases

    Teddy Roosevelt started a movement towards simplified spelling, but Congress didn't go for it. My fourth grade teacher always pronounced the 'r' in Febwary and I haven't heard anyone use orangutan in conversation in a while. I don't care about pronounciation, but most of the job applicants I deal with have such little skill in writing and spelling that we have changed our job applications from written to computer. They still screw it up.
    Just like Texas in 1880.

  3. #3
    ca
    Mar 2005
    London, ON
    529
    41 times

    Re: Fixing broken words and phrases

    Just don`t call it English - its all `Melican.

  4. #4
    us
    Jul 2009
    Whiting, NJ
    Ace 250
    10,503
    1052 times
    All Types Of Treasure Hunting

    Re: Fixing broken words and phrases

    Don't even get me started on this, some comedians hit the nail on the head years ago like George Carlin and Steven Wright.

    Why do you park in a driveway and drive on a parkway? SW


 

 

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