Bad Christmas

[bigscoop]

So I got up last night about 1am to use the bathroom but the door was locked because somebody else was already in there. From the sounds on the roof I figured it had to be raining outside but when I looked out the window the night sky was clear and the street was dry. The cookies I had left on the table next to the big easy chair, well, as I walked through the living room I suddenly noticed they were gone, hardly a crumb remained. Suddenly it hit me, "Santa was in my house, using my bathroom!" Oh how I wanted to turn on the lights and checkout my presents and stocking, but Santa was clearly still in my home, using my bathroom, and besides, I still had to pee and I didn't want Santa to see me awake. Not able to hold it any longer, and fearing that even if I could Santa would likely catch me sneaking about, I decided to go out side and pee behind a bush. Well, to make a long story short, cops arrested me right away and then a few hours later they also informed me that at some point that same night my house had been robbed and stripped clean. Basta$ds had even taken my shingles & toilet. Merry Christmas!

[DigginThePast]

Next time, when making cookies for Santa. Don't mix up the Exlax with chocolate and everything will be okay.