Some Fine Irishness:

[hammered]

The Irish have solved their fuel problems. They’ve imported 50 million tonnes of sand from the Arabs and are going to drill for their own oil.
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Paddy says to Mick, “Jeez, I’m ready for me holiday … but this year I’m going to do it a bit different. Three years ago I went to Spain - and Mary got pregnant. Two years ago I went to Italy - and Mary got pregnant. Last year I went to Majorca - and again Mary got pregnant.”



Mick asks, “So what are you going to do this year?”



Paddy replies, “Oi think Oi'll take her wid me!”
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Paddy says to Mick, "Christmas is on a Friday this year" ...



Mick says "Let's hope it's not the 13th."
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Paddy and Mick find three grenades, so they take them to a police station.



Mick says, "What if one explodes before we get there?"



Paddy: "We’ll lie and say we only found two."

 

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