Heres one for the guys

diggummup

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Jul 15, 2004
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Here's one for the guys

MALE VS. FEMALE AT THE ATM MACHINE

A new sign in the Bank Lobby reads:


'Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles.


Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts.


After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE Procedures have been developed. Please follow the Appropriate steps for your gender.'

*******************************
MALE PROCEDURE:
1. Drive up to the cash machine.
2. Put down your car window.
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
6. Put window up.
7. Drive off.


*******************************


FEMALE PROCEDURE:
What is really funny is that most of this part is the Truth.!!!!


1. Drive up to cash machine.
2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine.
3. Set parking brake, put the window down.
4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.
5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up.
6. Attempt to insert card into machine.
7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car.
8. Insert card.
9. Re-insert card the right way.
10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.
11. Enter PIN.
12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
13. Enter amount of cash required.
14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.
15. Retrieve cash and receipt.
16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.
17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of checkbook.
18. Re-check makeup.
19. Drive forward 2 feet.
20. Reverse back to cash machine.
21. Retrieve card.
22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided!
23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.
24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
25. Redial person on cell phone.
26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.
27. Release Parking Brake.
 

ModernMiner

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Jan 9, 2007
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Re: Here's one for the guys

Hilarious AND true!!! :laughing9: :tongue3:
Thanks,
MM
 

RPG

Bronze Member
Jan 10, 2009
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Re: Here's one for the guys

I got to give it to my wife. She's a very good driver. :thumbsup:

But my sister is not. She would do all that just to pull in a parking spot at Walmart. :tongue3:

I worry about that girl. :-\
 

paratrooper

Sr. Member
Sep 20, 2004
388
46
Kingman AZ
Re: Here's one for the guys

Now here is a real clincher for DUH!!! The ATM at the drive through at my bank has instructions in English and ...... ready for this ? ..... BRAILLE .
 

mikeofaustin

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Jan 24, 2008
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Re: Here's one for the guys

Yep... and ever so often I hear of a lawsuit againt video game companies not making there games 'blind friendly'.

A friend of mine works at the social security office... and he says, "The richest person that comes through our doors will be a person that is a blind or deaf, black, gay, women.

You have all the combination's for a person that is well within there rights to get a lot of money.

(for the record, I'm not hating on black, gay, women, etc... I'm simply stating what the government will actually use to determine your benefits... Really. He does this every day for a living).

//I'm sorry if I offended anyone. really.
 

sniffer

Gold Member
Dec 31, 2006
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XP DEUS
Re: Here's one for the guys

you forgot one thing, when she gets home she'll tell you all about it, including who she was talking to and about what
in great detail. what's really aggravating is, the person she is talking to, is someone you either don't know, or someone you really don't care to know
 

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