ranchers gotta love em

[texan connection]

Those ded-burn, hi-falutin', know-it-all, smart-ass government workers!



A Department of Water Resources representative stops at a Texas ranch and talks with an old rancher.

He tells the rancher, I need to inspect your ranch for your water allocation.

The old rancher says, 'Okay, but don't go in that field over there.'

The Water Representative says, 'Mister, I have the authority of the Federal Government with me.

See this card? This card means I am allowed to go WHEREVER I WISH on any agricultural land.

No questions asked or answered. Have I made myself clear? Do you understand?'

The old rancher nods politely and goes about his chores.

Later, the old rancher hears loud screams and spies the Water Rep running for his life and close behind

is the rancher's bull. The bull is gaining with every step. The Rep is clearly terrified, so the old rancher

immediately throws down his tools, runs to the fence and yells at the top of his lungs.....

'Your card! Show him your card!'

 

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[Old Dog]

ROFLMAO !!!!

 

[truckinbutch]

Actually happened to me and two of my redneck friends once.Possum cop stopped us in the middle of the night with a 'john doe' warrant on a back country road to search for illegal weapons and illgotten game.Searched the pickup cab to no avail and climbed into the pickup bed demanding keys to the locked tool boxes behind the cab,flaunting his power of the 'john doe'warrant.
Gave the man what he wanted and when he ripped the first lid up my 120 pound Oorange Airedale Terrier followed the lid and attached his teeth to the possum cop's necktie.
"Show him your paper!"was my first response.Possum cop was in a quandry cause the dog that has him by the neck can't read and won't listen to him.
I negotiated a deal that if I called the dog off he would leave us the hell alone and go about his business.He accepted .
Dog crawled back into the box when I told him to and the disheveled possum cop went on his way.
My buddies and I went home,petted the dog bigtime,and cleaned up the poached deer and the firearm the dog had been guarding in the box.

 

[stefen]