What would you do?

DizzyDigger

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Dec 9, 2012
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Got a bit of a conundrum, and wondering how others might approach this situation.

Facebook has a feature called "People you may know", which is a complete PITA as I have it turned off in every possible setting, and yet I'm still inundated with dozens of "people you may know" every day. I usually start closing them as fast as I can (clicking the X on each image), but today I actually saw a name I recognized.

It is the page of a fellow I knew well in high school, and we were both hot rod fanatics back then. He had a gorgeous and very fast '69 Nova that ran a well-built small block he built himself, and I had a '66 Chevelle with a substantially beefed up 396. We were good friends that got in plenty of trouble together while street racing. We graduated in 1977.

Lost track after graduation, and I often wondered how he fared in life. Well, today I found his Fbook page, and just as I was going to hit the "Friend request" button it dawned on me that I should look over his page to see what he'd been up to.

Glad I did, as it turns out he is a very involved political activist, and we are diametrically opposed, politically. Everything he's for, I'm against, and everything he's against, I'm for.

And therein is the rub. If I was to make contact, and we talked, there is no doubt he's going to bring up the political stuff, and I sure don't want to be talking politics with him, as it would destroy any discussion about what we've actually accomplished in life, such as marriage, kids, etc. (things that are actually important to old friends). His Fbook page is flooded with nothing but political activism, and while I believe every person has a right to believe what they wish, I sure don't want to talk about it, but doubt it can be avoided.

Would you send this person a friend request, or just let it go out of concern the politics are going to be an issue? I'd like to talk with my old friend again, but certainly don't want the conversation turning negative over freakin' politics.

This thread is about what you might do in a similar situation, and not at all about your or my political beliefs, so do not discuss politics.

Would you take a chance and send the friend request?
 

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Treasure_Hunter

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If you reach out just make it known you don't discuss politics or religion with friends and family of opposite political beliefs.

I have one remaining brother who is younger, he is liberal and I'm very conservative, we allowed politics to come between us and didn't talk for almost 2 years.

He wife who is also liberal reached out trying to get us back to communicating. We agreed to reopen communication but we both agreed no political discussion, I don't reply to his FB political posts or post political comments on his page and he stays off mine and we do not dusvuss politics when we are together. We are close now, talk on phone several times a week, live 120 miles apart, and it has worked out for us. I ignore his political posts, I assume he ignores mine, since we don't discuss politics at all
 

41Digger

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Mar 21, 2021
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Got a bit of a conundrum, and wondering how others might approach this situation.

Facebook has a feature called "People you may know", which is a complete PITA as I have it turned off in every possible setting, and yet I'm still inundated with dozens of "people you may know" every day. I usually start closing them as fast as I can (clicking the X on each image), but today I actually saw a name I recognized.

It is the page of a fellow I knew well in high school, and we were both hot rod fanatics back then. He had a gorgeous and very fast '69 Nova that ran a well-built small block he built himself, and I had a '66 Chevelle with a substantially beefed up 396. We were good friends that got in plenty of trouble together while street racing. We graduated in 1977.

Lost track after graduation, and I often wondered how he fared in life. Well, today I found his Fbook page, and just as I was going to hit the "Friend request" button it dawned on me that I should look over his page to see what he'd been up to.

Glad I did, as it turns out he is a very involved political activist, and we are diametrically opposed, politically. Everything he's for, I'm against, and everything he's against, I'm for.

And therein is the rub. If I was to make contact, and we talked, there is no doubt he's going to bring up the political stuff, and I sure don't want to be talking politics with him, as it would destroy any discussion about what we've actually accomplished in life, such as marriage, kids, etc. (things that are actually important to old friends). His Fbook page is flooded with nothing but political activism, and while I believe every person has a right to believe what they wish, I sure don't want to talk about it, but doubt it can be avoided.

Would you send this person a friend request, or just let it go out of concern the politics are going to be an issue? I'd like to talk with my old friend again, but certainly don't want the conversation turning negative over freakin' politics.

This thread is about what you might do in a similar situation, and not at all about your or my political beliefs, so do not discuss politics.

Would you take a chance and send the friend request?
UNFORTUNATELY POLITICS DICTATE OUR QUALITY OF LIFE, AND IS BECOMING HARDER AND HARDER TO IGNORE. WE ARE THE SAME AGE... WE NEVER HAD THIS PROBLEM GROWING UP..... NOT UNTIL FAIRLY RECENTLY
 

Bucket Lister

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Dec 20, 2023
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Got a bit of a conundrum, and wondering how others might approach this situation.

Facebook has a feature called "People you may know", which is a complete PITA as I have it turned off in every possible setting, and yet I'm still inundated with dozens of "people you may know" every day. I usually start closing them as fast as I can (clicking the X on each image), but today I actually saw a name I recognized.

It is the page of a fellow I knew well in high school, and we were both hot rod fanatics back then. He had a gorgeous and very fast '69 Nova that ran a well-built small block he built himself, and I had a '66 Chevelle with a substantially beefed up 396. We were good friends that got in plenty of trouble together while street racing. We graduated in 1977.

Lost track after graduation, and I often wondered how he fared in life. Well, today I found his Fbook page, and just as I was going to hit the "Friend request" button it dawned on me that I should look over his page to see what he'd been up to.

Glad I did, as it turns out he is a very involved political activist, and we are diametrically opposed, politically. Everything he's for, I'm against, and everything he's against, I'm for.

And therein is the rub. If I was to make contact, and we talked, there is no doubt he's going to bring up the political stuff, and I sure don't want to be talking politics with him, as it would destroy any discussion about what we've actually accomplished in life, such as marriage, kids, etc. (things that are actually important to old friends). His Fbook page is flooded with nothing but political activism, and while I believe every person has a right to believe what they wish, I sure don't want to talk about it, but doubt it can be avoided.

Would you send this person a friend request, or just let it go out of concern the politics are going to be an issue? I'd like to talk with my old friend again, but certainly don't want the conversation turning negative over freakin' politics.

This thread is about what you might do in a similar situation, and not at all about your or my political beliefs, so do not discuss politics.

Would you take a chance and send the friend request?
I've had many friends with different politics come & go over the years.

I've also tried to reconnect with old friends (regardless of politics), and had some reconnect with me. How did Chief Dan George put it in Little Big Man... "Sometimes the magic works, and sometimes it doesn't."

My opinion: If you want to reconnect, I would go for it, but try to keep a reign on my emotions. I wouldn't put up a barrier to communication by being first to proscribe politics (or any other subject). If it happens to come up (it may not come up at all), ask not to discuss it then. You won't know if you don't try--you'll only wonder (and regret). If it doesn't work out... :dontknow:

In my case, my friends (with one exception) are pretty much the same people they were then. If politics didn't affect friendships back then, they probably won't now (if they're the same person/character) but no guarantees.

Best Wishes
 

treasureguy56

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In my opinion , most good friendships are formed between like minded people . You can have friendships formed by interest in ones differences but when it comes to politics , especially between folks who arent spring chickens in age , it can get a bit dicey . In the end you'll make your own decision and Im sure you know whether he's the kind of person who can accept you as you are " with an open mind " or not .
I have a buddy who is (Deleted for rule violation) , but somehow we manage to always keep politics out of the conversation - he knows how I feel and I know how he feels and we leave it there . This is something rare and not the norm . Good luck !

Al
 

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Treasure_Hunter

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Please keep actual political comments out of thread....Thanks
 

newnan man

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That's a tough one. You haven't felt the need to contact him all these years until you saw his name pop up. That should factor in as well. If he was that good of a friend you would have stayed in touch, Facebook or not. I've never been on Facebook but many people seem to enjoy it. I have heard of a lot of problems that arose when old friends "reconnected."
 

Richard Guy

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Tried it and it doesn't work, the opposite will bring it up and then double-down if you object. Save yourself the grief and aggravation, ... I would not do it. Pray for him.
 

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DizzyDigger

DizzyDigger

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Dec 9, 2012
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Concrete, WA
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Nokta FoRs Gold, a Gold Cube, 2 Keene Sluices and Lord only knows how many pans....not to mention a load of other gear my wife still doesn't know about!
Primary Interest:
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First off, I sincerely appreciate the input from those who took the time to share their thoughts.

Gus and I were buddies in high school some 45+ years back, but since then haven't spoken. What we had in common then is no longer relevant now, and after a day of pondering the situation, I've decided to just let it go. Reviewed his Fbook page and did some googling, and can see he is so involved with his political activism that the subject could not be avoided in even a polite chat.

He seems happy in his life, I'm happy in mine, and sometimes it's best to just let things go, and I'm good with that.
 

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jeff of pa

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Stay off of Facebook? I've never been on it, and I feel like I'm a O.K. Human being...just saying
I Agree 100% With Sprailroad.

But since it's too late. Tread Lightly if it means that much :coffee2:
 

kingskid1611

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Feb 23, 2015
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I was adopted at the age of six. No contact with my biological father until 15. was told he wanted nothing to do with me etc... When I recieved a letter in the mail at 15 I discovered I was lied to and began to have a relationship with him. Now I was raised in Oklahoma as a conservative and he is from Washington and an active liberal. We have after 40 years determined that if we wanted our relationship to work we could not discuss politics or religion. It has done well for us....so reach out and let this be known.
 

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