Drum roll please............

[Spitfire Reddie]

Two mothers were talking about their sons. The first said, "My son is such a saint. He works hard, doesn't smoke, and he hasn't so much as looked at a woman in over two years."

The other woman said, "Well, my son is a saint himself. Not only hasn't he not looked at a woman in over three years, but he hasn't touched a drop of liquor in all that time."

"My word," the first mother said. "You must be so proud."

I am," the second mother replied. "And when he's paroled next month, I'm going to throw him a big party."

 

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[Spitfire Reddie]

The other night , a few friends of mine went out to this "Lady's Club." One of the women wanted to impress us. So, she pulled out a $10 bill.

The male dancer came over to us, and my friend licked the $10 bill and put it on his butt. Not to be out done, one of the other women pulled out a $50 bill. She called the guy back over, licked the $50 bill, and put it on his other butt cheek.

Now the attention was focused on me. What could I do to top that? I got out my wallet, thought for a minute, then the banker in me took over. I got my ATM card, swiped it down the male dancer's crack, grabbed the 60 bucks, and went home.