more computer stuff

[jerrync]

> Subject: ABBOTT and COSTELLO
>
>
> >
> >
> >
> >>You have to be old enough to remember Abbott and
> >>Costello, and too old to REALLY understand computers,
> >>to fully appreciate this.
> >>For those of us who sometimes get flustered by our
> >>computers, please read on..
> >>If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today,
> >>their infamous sketch, "Who's on First?" might
> >>have turned out something like this:
> >>*COSTELLO CALLS TO BUY A COMPUTER FROM ABBOTT*
> >>ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?
> >>COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den and I'm
thinking
> >>about buying a computer.
> >>ABBOTT: Mac?
> >>COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou.
> >>ABBOTT: Your computer?
> >>COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.
> >>ABBOTT: Mac?
> >>COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou.
> >>ABBOTT: What about Windows?
> >>COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?
> >>ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?
> >>COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look at the windows?
> >>ABBOTT: Wallpaper.
> >>COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.
> >>ABBOTT: Software for Windows?
> >>COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write
> >>proposals, track expenses, and run my business. What do you have?
> >>ABBOTT: Office.
> >>COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?
> >>ABBOTT: I just did.
> >>COSTELLO: You just did what?
> >>ABBOTT: Recommend something.
> >>COSTELLO: You recommended something?
> >>ABBOTT: Yes.
> >>COSTELLO: For my office?
> >>ABBOTT: Yes.
> >>COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?
> >>ABBOTT: Office.
> >>COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!
> >>ABBOTT: I recommend Office with Windows.
> >>COSTELLO: I already have an office with windows! OK, let's just say
I'm
> >>sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I
need?
> >>ABBOTT: Word.
> >>COSTELLO: What word?
> >>ABBOTT: Word in Office.
> >>COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.
> >>ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.
> >>COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows?
> >>ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue "W".
> >>COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue "w" if you don't start with
some
> >>straight answers. What about financial bookkeeping? You have
> >>anything I can track my money with?
> >>ABBOTT: Money.
> >>COSTELLO: That's right. What do you have?
> >>ABBOTT: Money.
> >>COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?
> >>ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.
> >>COSTELLO: What's bundled with my computer?
> >>ABBOTT: Money.
> >>COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?
> >>ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.
> >>COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?
> >>ABBOTT: One copy.
> >>COSTELLO: Isn't it illegal to copy money?
> >>ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.
> >>COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money?
> >>ABBOTT: Why not? THEY OWN IT!
> >>(A few days later)
> >>ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help
> >>you?
> >>COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?
> >>ABBOTT: Click on "START".......

 

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