Out of the mouths of children.....

[DeepseekerADS]

A Sunday school teacher asked her third grade class if they knew what resurrection is. After careful thought, one young boy in the class raised his hand and answered "I'm not sure what resurrection is, but I know if it lasts longer than four hours you're supposed to call the doctor."

One day a 6 year old girl was sitting in a classroom. The teacher was going to explain evolution to the children. The teacher asked a little boy.
TEACHER: Tommy do you see the tree outside?
TOMMY: Yes.
TEACHER: Tommy, do you see the grass outside?
TOMMY: Yes.
TEACHER: Go outside and look up and see if you can see the sky.
TOMMY: Okay.(He returned a few minutes later) Yes, I saw the sky.
TEACHER: Did you see God?
TOMMY: No.
TEACHER: That’s my point. We can’t see God because he isn’t there! He doesn’t exist.
A little girl spoke up and wanted to ask the boy some questions. The teacher agreed and the little girl asked:
LITTLE GIRL: Tommy, do you see the tree outside?
TOMMY: Yes.
LITTLE GIRL: Tommy do you see the grass outside?
TOMMY: Yessssss (getting tired of the questions by this time).
LITTLE GIRL: Did you see the sky?
TOMMY: Yessssss
LITTLE GIRL: Tommy, do you see the teacher?
TOMMY: Yes
LITTLE GIRL: Do you see her brain?
TOMMY: No
LITTLE GIRL: Then according to what we were taught today in school, she must not have one!

 

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[tncreeker]

While working at a corner market in Maine, my 4 year old son in tow. He picked a condom off of the shelf and asked me what it was. Lame excuse about protecting the "pecker" (family name). He wanted to protect his pecker, so i explained that it was too big. Next question was "So I need a big one like Daddy?: I said yes,,when you get bigger you can wear one. Can I keep it for later? Yes Josh, put it in your pocket for later. Couple of hours later, in walks an Attorney from up the street. Gets his gum and cigs, waiting for change, here comes Josh with his condom in his hand. " Hey mithter,,you got a big pecker like my daddy?"
I could have died right there!!! Swear to you ,,,,,,,True story!!

 

[Goose-0]

The kids will do it every time.

 

[stefen]

What do you call a wash basin in a cat house?

A Peter Pan...

 

[Ninjafossils]

A teacher was teaching Billy's fifth grade class. Billy was an immature child who constantly made "mature" references. One day, the teacher is talking about the color of the ocean and notices that billy isn't paying attention. She calls on him and asks "what is big, Salty, and is full of sea men". Billy replies with the..... umm obvious answer. This angers the teacher and tells him that the correct answer was the ocean. He cries out that it was way too difficult. The teacher says none sense and tells billy to ask her one. Billy says "What's hard, has a head, and is in my pocket?" Billy's teacher tells him that he is a disgusting pervert. Billy says "relax it's just a quarter. But I like the way u think."