SOME FUNNIES

[Ray S S]

The following are some pieces from an E-mail I got last week. Maybe some of you
can get a chuckle out of some them.

Ray

HONESTY

My son, Zachary, 4 came running out of the bathroom to tell me he'd dropped his
toothbrush in the toilet. So I fished it out and threw it in the garbage. Zachary
stood there thinking for a moment , then ran to my bathroom and came out with my
toothbrush. He held it up and said with a charming little smile, "We better throw
this one out, too, then, 'cause it fell in the toilet a few days ago!"



KETCHUP

A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup to come out of the jar. During her
struggle, the phone rang so she asked her 4-year-old daughter to answer the
phone. "It's the minister, Mommy, "the child said to her mother. Then she added,
"mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you right now. She's hitting the
bottle.'



NUDITY

I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a
woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked!
As I was reeling from the shock, i heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat,
"Mom! That lady isn't wearing a seat belt!"


More nudity

A little boy got lost in the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker
room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shreaks, with ladies grabbing
towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then
asked, "What's the matter? Haven't you seen a little boy before?"


DRESS-UP

A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her
dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, "Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit."
"And why not, Darling?'
"You know that it always gives you a headache in the morning."


ELDERLY

While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins,
I used to takemy 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. The various
appliences of old age, particularly the canes walkers, wheelchairs, unfailingly
intreagued her. One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking
in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she
merely turned and whispered, "The tooth fairy will never believe this."



BIBLE

A little boy opened the big family Bible at his Grandma's house. He was fascinated
as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly something fell out of the Bible.
He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had
been pressed between the pages. "Mama, look what I found!" the boy called out.
"What have you got there, Dear?" With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he
answered, "I think it's Adam's underwear!"

 

[Digginman]

These are great, Ray.

DM

 

[Ray S S]

Thanks, Bobby , for the complement. Glad you liked them.

Have a good day and Happy Hunting,

Ray

 

[spartacus53]

Some good ones there