the purina diet

strickman

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Yesterday I was at my local COSTCO


buying a large bag of Purina dog chow


for my loyal pet, Molson, the Wonder Dog and was in the


checkout line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.


What did she think I had, an elephant? So since


I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I


didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again... I added that I


probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that


I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with


tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.


I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that


it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply


eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally


complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to


mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with


my story.)


Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because


the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff


an Irish Setter's butt and a car hit us both.


I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart


attack he was laughing so hard.


Costco won't let me shop there anymore..


Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the


world to think of crazy things to say.
 

:laughing7: :laughing7:

Next time add in the part about the Purina suppositories also helping with weight loss. :laughing9: :laughing9:
 

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