Tips for Handling Telemarketers

S

stefen

Guest
Three Little Words That Work!!

(1)The three little words are: 'Hold On, Please...'

Saying this, while putting down your phone and walking off (instead of hanging-up immediately) would make each telemarketing call so much more time-consuming that boiler room sales would grind to a halt.

Then when you eventually hear the phone company's 'beep-beep-beep' tone, you know it's time to go back and hang up your handset, which has efficiently completed its task.

These three little words will help eliminate telephone soliciting.

(2) Do you ever get those annoying phone calls with no one on the other end?

This is a telemarketing technique where a machine makes phone calls and records the time of day when a person answers the phone.

This technique is used to determine the best time of day for a 'real' sales person to call back and get someone at home.

What you can do after answering, if you notice there is no one there, is to immediately start hitting your # button on the phone, 6 or 7 times as quickly as possible. This confuses the machine that dialed the call, and it kicks your number out of their system. Gosh, what a shame not to have your name in their system any longer!!!

(3) Junk Mail Help:

When you get 'ads' enclosed with your phone or utility bill, return these 'ads' with your payment. Let the sending companies throw their own junk mail away.

When you get those 'pre-approved' letters in the mail for everything from credit cards to 2nd mortgages and similar type junk, do not throw away the return envelope.

Most of these come with postage-paid return envelopes, right? It costs them more than the regular 41 cents postage, 'IF' and when they receive them back.

It costs them nothing if you throw them away! The postage was around 50 cents before the last increase and it is according to the weight. In that case, why not get rid of some of your other junk mail and put it in these cool little, postage-paid return envelopes.


One of (60 minutes) ideas.

Send an ad for your local chimney cleaner to American Express. Send a pizza coupon to Citibank. If you didn't get anything else that day, then just send them their blank application back!
If you want to remain anonymous, just make sure your name isn't on anything you send them.

You can even send the envelope back empty if you want to just to keep them guessing! It still costs them 41 cents.

The banks and credit card companies are currently getting a lot of their own junk back in the mail, but folks, we need to OVERWHELM them. Let's let them know what it's like to get lots of junk mail, and best of all they're paying for it...Twice!

Let's help keep our postal service busy since they are saying that e-mail is cutting into their business profits, and that's why they need to increase postage costs again. You get the idea!

If enough people follow these tips, it will work ----
 

ClonedSIM

Silver Member
Jul 28, 2005
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I like Jerry Seinfeld's method of dealing with telemarketers.

"Hello? Yes, this is Jerry Seinfeld."
talking on other end of line
"No, I'm sorry, I don't have time to talk now, but if you'll give me your home number I can call you back later."
talking on other end of line
"You don't like to give out your home number? Now you know how I feel!"
hangs up
 

jb7487

Sr. Member
Apr 16, 2009
354
19
My old social studies teacher imparted these same bits of wisdom on me roughly 25 years ago. He used to send the pre-paid envelopes back empty. It is true that if enough people did this the problem would be solved. It would also help out the post office as they would be making a lot of money for processing what is essentially a very low weight item.

As for the phone calls I don't see a real solution in sight. It's funny that the legislators recently decided that automated calls should fall under the do not call rules which should reduce their volume. However, they made an exception for all of those annoying political calls we get near election day. Go figure! >:(
 

johnnycat

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Aug 19, 2007
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Ha...If the caller is hispanic I speak only in english. If the caller is english I speak either spanish or Native American Indian. After a short silence they hang up. ;D
 

Mark S.

Sr. Member
Jan 25, 2005
331
20
I have been doing the return mail deal for a while. I let them accumulate then dump it all in a pile. I add any other junk flyers and magazine items and then start stuffing. I fill them absolutely full. If there is any room left I will add some newspaper and even something heavy. Like some metal detecting junk! Nothing harmful just washers and the like. The heavier the better.

For those phone calls......If you get a live body on the line then keep them talking. Lead them on. Play dumb. Ask them all kinds of stupid questions and see if they have a response. Change the subject. Talk dirty to them, tell them you are naked (they called you so they cant get you for making an obscene call). Give the phone to your kids. My daughter loves to talk on the phone. Have fun with it.

Examples.... I got a magazines call so I let him "take" me. Within minutes I was going to get almost every magazine known to man. And at a special price. Just when he thought I was dead meat I ask him if they had all those in braille! He stuttered and said I don't know. I told him that I was blind so I would need them all in braille. Then I told him that I just remembered that I was also deaf. Then I hung up.

Got a call asking to speak to the person who handles the finances. I told him that would be Nathan but he was in bed as it was past his bedtime. She didn't want to disturb him so could she call back. I said yes but make sure it's before 7:30. She ask why he goes to bed so early. I said because he's 7 years old. There was silence. I said he is very smart for his age and we let him make all our financial decisions. I think she hung up on me!

Another guy tried to sell me a septic system. After 10 minutes on the phone I ask him where I would put one of those as I live in a 10th floor apartment! I don't really and my septic is fine.


I do live in a log home and one of these days when I get a siding sales call I am going to tell them to come out and give me a quote.



Mark S.
 

savant365

Silver Member
Mar 28, 2007
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I finally figured out how to have fun with them and get them to stop calling. I just try to have phone sex with them. Start talking dirty to them and asking them questions like what are they wearing and what do they like, etc... I feel like making them hang up on me is better then me hanging up on them. That means I win!

Charlie
 

Tank69

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May 5, 2009
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;D they call I ask em to hold a second so I can grab a pen an paper then let the 5 year old talk to em , they hang up lol :laughing9:
 

RPG

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Jan 10, 2009
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This is a family friendly site so I can't tell you how I handle them. :laughing7:
 

spartacus53

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Jul 5, 2009
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I have done the following two things which did stop junk mail and the calls. It took a while but it worked for me.

1 Junk Mail I take their mail mail and overstuff it with any type of paper including old ice cream wraps and mailed it back.

2- Phone calls I like to alternate between the 2 following lines
a- what are you wearing now while breathing in a rasp
2- I have new socks and keep repeating it if they continue to talk.

It was fun while it lasted, but both have stopped.
 

S

Smee

Guest
The answer to every question they ask is the same. "Cactus" is a favorite as I heard it on a prank call site. Telemarketer calls, answer to every question was the same, with only the voice inflection changing. "Cactus?" "Cactus!" "Cactus . . . "

Sometimes I alternate with Pizza or a body part or "ouch".

Another favorite: "I don't remember eating corn . . . " followed by a flushing sound.
 

Siegfried Schlagrule

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I say i'm really interested in that but I can't spend that much without talking to my wife. Then i ask will they get the commission if i just call in the order and say to credit it to them. When they say no I say then you'd better give me your home number so you'll get the commission. I was working til 4AM and they were calling me at 9AM. I called them every night at 3AM until the guy asked what it would take to get me to stop calling him. I said take down my name and go in to work and take my name and number out of every call list you have. If I hear from your company again i start calling again. works like a charm. siegfried schlagrule
 

OP
OP
S

stefen

Guest
RPG said:
This is a family friendly site so I can't tell you how I handle them. :laughing7:

I suspect you use the same degree of tact as I do, so I'll not embarrass either of us :laughing7:
 

drgest

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Apr 6, 2007
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I like your method the best Tank :laughing7: I figure your 5 year old gets some enjoyment out of it an you get some entertainment. I get a lot survey calls at work and the best line that has worked every single time, when nothing else seems to, is "I'm sorry, it is against our policy to participate in surveys over the phone". It works without fail and most of the time they apologize before hanging up. Otherwise, they will argue, plead, etc. but heaven forbid they make you do something that's AGAINST POLICY.
 

Immy

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Mar 12, 2005
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Great ideas all!

Not only have I been sending back pre-paid evelopes but I put taunting post-its inside, like "Postage is on you!"

I get a lot of telemarket calls at work, so I now have a Youtube clip ready to go on my PC. I tell them to hold and before they know it they're talking to Larry the Cable Guy. :laughing9:
 

Ray S ECenFL

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Feb 17, 2007
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If one calls my home and as for me or my wife by name, I say
You really called at a bad time, you see, Mr. X passed away this morning.

That is usually followed by a lot of stuttering , I then say thank you and hang up.

:laughing7:
 

Zephyr

Hero Member
Nov 26, 2006
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If you just say "I rent", they'll hang up faster than you can.... ;D

(It's true!)
 

diggemall

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Apr 19, 2006
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I use Phonetray. It's freebie-ware that runs on your PC. All you need is a phone line into your modem jack. You can set it up to do a variety of things including playing your own recorded message, hanging up on selected numbers, etc. etc. It also keeps a log of incoming calls and can announce the caller ID info out loud for you so you don't waste your time wandering over to see who's calling now................

Diggem'
 

G.I.B.

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Thanks GunFarce, I've still got tears in my eyes...
 

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