MAXINE SAYS

Michelle

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this may have been posted once already














Men strike back! ! ! ! ! ! !

How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened when she brings it
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Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will

probably never be able to support you.
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Why do women have smaller feet than men?
It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows
them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
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How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me..."
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How do you fix a woman's watch?
You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
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Why do men fart more than women?
Because women can't shut up long enough to
build up the required pressure.
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If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling

at the front door, who do you let in first?
The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
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What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
A woman who won't do what she's told
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I married a Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always.
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Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes
a woman's sex drive by 90%.
It's called a Wedding Cake.
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Why do men die before their wives?
They want to.
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Women will never be equal to men until they can
walk down the street with a bald head and a beer
gut, and still think they are sexy.
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In the beginning, God created the earth and rested.
Then God created Man and rested.
Then God created Woman.
Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.
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Send this to a few good men who need a laugh and
to the select few women who can handle the truth !








AND MAXINE SAYS.....
 

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8) 8) Michelle: I'm glad to see you've finally seen the light! Keep it up!


JOE ;) ;)
 

;) I just knew YOU would see this and TOTALLY AGREE!!!! :D :D
 

Well. Thats one that came over to our side.

Now lets get the others even if its one at a time.
 

Sorry ladies ...time to come back......NEED BACKUP HERE! ;)
 

A SWEET STORY ABOUT ITALIAN COOKIES..................

An elderly Italian man lay dying in his bed. While suffering the agonies of impending death, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favourite Italian anisette sprinkle cookies wafting up the stairs. Gathering his remaining strength, he lifted himself from the bed. Leaning against the wall, he slowly made his way out of the bedroom, and with even greater effort, gripping the railing with both hands he crawled downstairs. With laboured breath, he leaned against the doorframe, gazing into the kitchen. Where if not for death's agony, he would have thought himself already in heaven. For there, spread out upon waxed paper on the kitchen table were literally hundreds of his favourite anisette sprinkled cookies. Was it heaven? Or was it one final act of heroic love from his devoted Italian wife of sixty years seeing to it that he left this world a happy man? Mustering one great final effort, he threw himself towards the table, landing on his knees in a crumpled posture. His parched lips parted, the wondrous taste of the cookie was already in his mouth, seemingly bringing him back to life. The aged and withered hand trembled on its way to a cookie at the edge of the table, when it was suddenly smacked with a spatula by his wife..................

"Get out of here!" she shouted, "They're for the funeral."
 

:D :D
 

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:o :o Stefen: I sense Hostility here!

Michelle: Pretty Good Story!!!!!!

And the Moral is ?

Maybe it's "I can make even your last moments on Earth, a living hell!!

or you could add that Grandpa died w/ a smile on his face, eyes raised to Heaven, muttering, "Thank you, thank you...!"

Joe
 

:P
 

No hostility intended...just agreeing with facts ;D

One thing I learned in life...never step on a cow plop cause it may be thin crusted ;D
 

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