What would you do? (Possible solution!)

[Immy]

Situation: I have an older co-worker/friend in her mid-50s I've known for over 10 years. Nice woman, very funny and is a quick study of people and behavior. She's fantastic to talk too (I'm a guy in case some of you don't know me).

Problem: Once in awhile our job entails social engagements. In my opinion, and this has been reinforced by others, she dresses too provocatively, especially low cut tops displaying D-cup cleavage that has seen better years. I should mention these engagements do not have any business objectives, so it's not like she thinks dressing this way will "close a deal" or something like that. It's simply casual socializing with like-business people.

I got some feedback from another close female friend who said she "resembled a hooker" at a recent gathering (I didn't attend). Now before you say anything like "Oh, she's just jealous" let me emphasize that I trust this 2nd woman's opinion. She's a classy, beautiful woman who is not prone to jealousy.

So what should I do? Bring it up and risk offending her? She trusts my opinion but this cuts pretty close on the criticism meter. Plus she's very appearance-conscious. I really think she's lost perspective about what's sexy vs. what's slutty.

Any ideas?

 

[shaun7]

Re: What would you do?

Best just leave it

 

[sniffer]

Re: What would you do?

that's one of those deals, where no matter what you say, they'll be offended.
better off to leave it alone.
walk away, just walk away

 

[DigginThePast]

Re: What would you do?

Wait until the next get together and hire the most repulsive man you can find to relentlessly hit on her. When she complains about it tell her maybe she just dresses too sexy and maybe she should tone it down for her own good.

Nah, I'd steer clear of the whole thing, trouble for sure. If the other woman brings it up again just stick your fingers in your ears while she talks and go la la la until she stops talking about it.

 

[Immy]

Re: What would you do?

Hmm, I like that "hire a ringer" idea. I know a few guys who'll say just about anything to people once they have a few drinks. She might get the hint after hearing it more than once.

It's too bad really because she's single and looking, but she's putting out the wrong bait, and attracting the wrong fish.

 

[Shortstack]

Re: What would you do?

Please FORGET the "ringer" idea. If she's a nice woman, don't embarrass her like that. Why doesn't that other woman have a quiet, PRIVATE talk with her about the "too suggestive" way she dresses?

Whatever you do, please don't embarrass this lady. It could be way more devastating than you can imagine.

 

[thrillathahunt]

Re: What would you do?

A woman in her mid 50's with D-CUP cleavage that's seen better years. Now there's a visual! Ouch.

 

[Seamuss]

Re: What would you do?

How well do you get along with the people you work with. Bringing this subject up will change things in the work place.

Silence can be golden in the work place.

 

[K*E*L*L*Y]

Re: What would you do?

A woman in her mid 50's with D-CUP cleavage that's seen better years. Now there's a visual! Ouch.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
THATS THE FIRST THING I THOUGHT!!!
O-M-G!!! a photo wouldnt have helped... thanks for NOT posting one!
and going forward... i wouldnt be seen in public with this chick!
50 is wayyyyyyy to old to be... um... dressing like a "SLUORE"

 

[aa battery]

Re: What would you do?

A woman in her mid 50's with D-CUP cleavage that's seen better years. Now there's a visual! Ouch.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
THATS THE FIRST THING I THOUGHT!!!
O-M-G!!! a photo wouldnt have helped... thanks for NOT posting one!
and going forward... i wouldnt be seen in public with this chick!
50 is wayyyyyyy to old to be... um... dressing like a "SLUORE"

you need a spankin If ya say anything bout it you will be crucified and hung out to dry. Trust me been there .

 

[K*E*L*L*Y]

Re: What would you do?

A woman in her mid 50's with D-CUP cleavage that's seen better years. Now there's a visual! Ouch.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
THATS THE FIRST THING I THOUGHT!!!
O-M-G!!! a photo wouldnt have helped... thanks for NOT posting one!
and going forward... i wouldnt be seen in public with this chick!
50 is wayyyyyyy to old to be... um... dressing like a "SLUORE"

you need a spankin If ya say anything bout it you will be crucified and hung out to dry. Trust me been there .

heheheh just being honest! and AA.... a spankin REALLY? like YOU wanna see this 50yrs boobs! even if ya dont know her... its still a no no

 

[aa battery]

Re: What would you do?

A woman in her mid 50's with D-CUP cleavage that's seen better years. Now there's a visual! Ouch.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
THATS THE FIRST THING I THOUGHT!!!
O-M-G!!! a photo wouldnt have helped... thanks for NOT posting one!
and going forward... i wouldnt be seen in public with this chick!
50 is wayyyyyyy to old to be... um... dressing like a "SLUORE"

you need a spankin If ya say anything bout it you will be crucified and hung out to dry. Trust me been there .

heheheh just being honest! and AA.... a spankin REALLY? like YOU wanna see this 50yrs boobs! even if ya dont know her... its still a no no

just hanggin around

 

[ashleen]

Re: What would you do?

Immy,
Don't get involved in this!
Bitch bites can get pretty nasty!

 

[bill-USA]

Re: What would you do?

I agree with most of those who said, "You shouldn't know there is a problem." Eventually someone will say something to her and the $@#$ will fly. Don't let it be at you. Then you can be supportive and make some helpful suggestions, but don't initiate it.

Steer clear, only 10% if the iceberg is visible.

 

[bill-USA]

Re: What would you do?

Another thought occurred.

At the next social gathering, take some video and when the opportunity presents it self, show them to her. Let her analyze her own appearance. You might be surprised how her perceptions and visual reality clash.

 

[ivan salis]

Re: What would you do?

shes using what bait shes got left to fish with hoping for a "fish to come by for a nibble" hoping to hook one -- 50 and lonely sucks and most older women think their much hotter than they really are ( no woman ever wants to be thought of as a "has been " old slutty looking hag -- to let one think that you think of them looking like that is the kiss of death for a freindship) --most men too for that matter over rate themselves and ill handle the bare truth -- sooner or later someone will lower the boom on her --then you can be a real helpful freind

 

[SwampHunter]

Re: What would you do?

Best leave it alone. She is not hurting anyone. In fact I would not even talk about it to your other friend. When it goes south you will be caught in the middle of all of this. It will eventually go south because people love to talk about other people. It's just human nature for drama to breed. You don't want to be anywhere near ground zero. Never speak of this again. You have been warned.

 

[lonesomebob]

Re: What would you do?

Really ; its a no win situation.

 

[K*E*L*L*Y]

Re: What would you do?

A woman in her mid 50's with D-CUP cleavage that's seen better years. Now there's a visual! Ouch.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
THATS THE FIRST THING I THOUGHT!!!
O-M-G!!! a photo wouldnt have helped... thanks for NOT posting one!
and going forward... i wouldnt be seen in public with this chick!
50 is wayyyyyyy to old to be... um... dressing like a "SLUORE"

you need a spankin If ya say anything bout it you will be crucified and hung out to dry. Trust me been there .

heheheh just being honest! and AA.... a spankin REALLY? like YOU wanna see this 50yrs boobs! even if ya dont know her... its still a no no

just hanggin around

frank i loveeeeee you!

 

[WindHarvester]

Re: What would you do?

You should just hook up with her, older girls need a little luvin too.

She is a coworker afterall, take one for the team man. You'll be the talk of the office