Doctors office

BosnMate

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This old Marine knew his stuff ! You'll enjoy his approach...

My Medical Appointment


I visited a physician last week who was quite enthusiastic. It was a “new” doctor in the practice, a young lady (at MY age, EVERYBODY is “young”! When I was born, the Dead Sea wasn‘t even sick! ) She was obviously a liberal by her dress and manner. I was thinking of hitting on her, but I don’t like the phrase she used, “You remind me of my grandfather.”

She asked me what was wrong, and I replied, “I have a cut on my leg; and I think it may be getting infected.” She said, “Before we start, I have to ask you a few questions. Are you allergic to any medications?” I replied, “No.” She said, “Do you have any guns in the house?” I said, “HUH??”
She replied, “Guns. Do you have any guns in the house?” I asked, “Why?” She said, “I’ve got to ask this question. It is required under the Affordable Care Act.”
I asked, “What are you going to do with the data?” She said, “We compile it, amalgamate it, and submit it to the government.” I said, “Well, I have a Tommy Gun. I let my kid Tommy play with it.”
She said, “What’s a Tommy Gun? I don‘t think that is the kind of gun they are concerned with.” With THAT, I knew I had a live one. I said, “It’s similar to a B.A.R., but a little heavier and shorter. I have a B.A.R. also.” She said, “A B.A.R.?” I said, “Yes.” She looked puzzled. Then she brightened up and asked, “Do you have any assault rifles?” I attempted to look puzzled, and said , “I don’t know. What is an assault rifle?” She said, “That’s a gun that is used in wars.” I said, “As a matter of fact, I do I have a replica of a Revolutionary War musket.” She began to look a bit exasperated. I pretended not to notice and kept up the appearance of trying to be helpful. She said, “Do you have anything more modern than that?” I replied, “Well, yes I do. I have a replica muzzle loader from the Civil War. Do you know the difference between a musket and a muzzle loader?” She rather peevishly said, “No, I don’t; and I don’t want to. What else do you have?” I said, “I have an M-1.” She asked, “What’s that?” I said, “A rifle.”
She asked, “What kind?” I replied, “It is called a Garand.” She rather loudly said, “I don’t care if it is a grand rifle or not. Is it an assault rifle?” To which I replied, “I don’t know. I don’t know what an assault rifle is. You say it’s a rifle used in war, yet you say that my musket and muzzle loader are not assault rifles.” She calmed down (a bit) and asked, “Anything else?” I said, “I have an MG-.30, and an MG-.50. I‘m also part owner of an Apache. But they are not rifles.” She stated, “Well, then, I’m not interested in them. Anything else.” I replied, “Well, yes. I also have a 12-gauge and a 20-gauge pump. They are not rifled though.” She said, “I’m not interested in pumps; I’m interested in guns.” I replied, “Well, then, I have a Colt, a Luger, a Glock, a bazooka, a Parabellum, a Kalishnikov, a Henry, an Uzi, a Llama, and a Beretta--but they are not rifles.”

She then said, “I’ve had enough of this. I think you’re toying with me. Let me see your leg.” I then said, “Excuse me, but before you look at my leg, I have a few questions to ask of you.” She replied, “Of course. What are they?” I said, “I have given you a lot of information about my guns. I am somewhat concerned about your knowledge and ability to assimilate, make coherent sense of that information, and report it correctly. Do you know the difference between a .22 caliber and a .223 caliber? It’s a rather fundamental difference.” She replied, “Actually, I don’t.” I said, “I see. Let me ask some more relevant questions. “How much money do you make?” She said, “That’s personal, why do you ask?” I said, “Well, in pushing the Health Care Act, my president cautioned the population about doctors that would amputate a leg rather than treat a cut because they make more money that way. Consequently, I wish to know if you are financially troubled. What kind of car do you drive? What are your house payments? How much is your mortgage? How much credit card debt do you have? Do you have a student loan; if so, how much?” She said, “I’m not going to answer those questions. You have no right to ask them.”


I then asked, “Do you have training and education in homeopathic techniques? Do you know the benefits/effects of CoQ10, ginseng, fish oil, Creatine, BCAA, and other such herbal treatments?” Do you know the difference between Panax ginseng, American ginseng, and Siberian ginseng?” She replied, “Well, No!” I then asked, ”Well, have you studied it at all?” She replied rather defensively, “NO; it’s all a bunch of hogwash anyway!” I said, “Oh, then you have read the research on it. What have you read?” She then said, “I don’t waste my time reading such things. Why are you asking me these questions?” I said, “Well, if I’m going to turn my body over to you for treatment, I believe it is reasonable for me to know something about your motivation, training, experience, and competence. Do you know anything about the practice of holistic medicine?” She said, rather angrily “No, I don’t!” I said, “Oh. O.K. How much experience do you have in practicing medicine?” She replied, “Well, not very much.” To which I said, “Well, we all have to start somewhere. What medical school did you go to; what is its rank in terms of other medical schools; where did you intern; and where did you do your residency? What is the rank of the hospital where you did your internship and residency?” She rather peevishly said, “All my credentials are posted in the waiting room.” To which I said, “Really? The rank of your medical school is posted in the waiting room? Do you have any experience with leg injuries? If so, how much?” I guess that was too much for her. She rather crossly said, “I think it would be best if you saw a different doctor.” ...and started to leave the room.

I said, “You know, doctor. You asked me irrelevant questions about my guns, and I answered them. Whether or not I own guns is really none of your business and has absolutely nothing to do with any treatment you might prescribe. On the other hand, I ask you questions quite relevant to my situation, and you refuse to answer them. Isn’t that somewhat backwards?” She said, “But I HAVE to ask those questions. It’s the law.” To which I replied, “Actually, it is NOT the law. Here is what the law says--taken directly from the Affordable Care Act:”

(1) WELLNESS AND PREVENTION PROGRAMS. —A wellness and health promotion activity implemented under subsection (a) (1) (D) may not require the disclosure or collection of any information elating to:


(A) the presence or storage of a lawfully-possessed firearm or ammunition in the residence or on the property of an individual; or
(B) the lawful use, possession, or storage of a firearm or ammunition by an individual.


(2) LIMITATION ON DATA COLLECTION . —None of the authorities provided to the Secretary under the Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act or an amendment made by that act shall be construed to authorize or may be used for the collection of any information relating to-


(A) the lawful ownership or possession of a firearm or ammunition;
(B) the lawful use of a firearm or ammunition; or
(C) the lawful storage of a firearm or ammunition.

You may verify this at,


: http://housedocs.house.gov/energycommerce/ppacacon.pdf

and

Obamacare Amendment Does Not Forbid Gun and Ammo Registration | Wizbang .”


“As you can see, you have broken federal law TWICE--once by asking, and once by collecting data.
It is perfectly legal for me to own guns; it is NOT legal for you to ask and/or collect such data. YOU are breaking the law, and yet YOU are the one that is angry. Not only that, but you erroneously stated that you must ask such questions, and you did it in a very authoritative and convincing manner. You gave me false information, which I then acted upon by answering your questions. On that basis, how can I be expected to trust your medical judgment? When I attempted to ascertain your medical competency, you became defensive and hostile.” “There is really no need for me to see another doctor in this practice. I‘ll go somewhere else, where my privacy is respected, and I can trust the information I receive.”

Semper Fidelis,
Marty
Colonel, U. S. Marine Corps, Retired
 

Dave44

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I like it. Thanks Bosn!
 

onfire

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I to have no problem screwing with doctors, Unless it's a emergency I get more information from my pharmacist. I say question everything they prescribe. (Example My wife needs to takes a pill for her thyroid Dr. said with that take a calcium supplement Trouble is he never told her to take them 4 hrs apart. Calcium negates the affects of the thyroid pill. )
 

Chadeaux

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Love it Bosn. It has been almost two years ago, but I had to go to the local clinic for a problem. They actually DID ask about my guns. Asked her, in my best broken english, "What is gun paleface?"
 

XLTer

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Love it Bosn. It has been almost two years ago, but I had to go to the local clinic for a problem. They actually DID ask about my guns. Asked her, in my best broken english, "What is gun paleface?"

:laughing7:Excellent Chadeaux......:thumbsup:
 

DizzyDigger

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Got asked the same question by the ARNP gal I see, and she wasn't real happy
about asking..lol

I simply told her to write down that "It's none of their damn business what firearms
I own". End of discussion.

She's still my doc, and a darn good one who completely disagrees with the governments
desire to reduce the God given rights of Americans.
 

CoilyGirl

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Next time I go to the doctor and if they ask me if I have any guns I'm gonna flex my biceps at 'em.
 

0121stockpicker

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No one is forcing anyone to go to the drs office. Stay home and save us all from being soaked by Medicare.
 

0121stockpicker

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Wow that's really disrespectful.

About as disrespectful as people are on this thread to medical professionals. Show some respect to those who spend years and years and years of their lives learning how to save lives.
 

Treasure_Hunter

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Next time just tell them you have a dozen Ar-15s and 100,000 rounds of ammo in case there is a zombie breakout.... "Would you like to know about my bazookas and mortars too?"
 

0121stockpicker

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Next time just tell them you have a dozen Ar-15s and 100,000 rounds of ammo in case there is a zombie breakout.... "Would you like to know about my bazookas and mortars too?"

Or maybe you could respect the people who keep you healthy and alive??
 

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Treasure_Hunter

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Or maybe you could respect the people who keep you healthy and alive??

Not when they are asking questions that are none of their business.................I have no problem finding a another doctor.....
 

mtau

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The only Dr. that may have a reason to ask about your guns, would be a psychiatrist, and then only if you are determined to be a threat to yourself or someone else.
 

mercury1

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Bosnmate, that's the funniest thread I've read in a while. Thanks for the laugh. You owned her.
 

mercury1

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Or maybe you could respect the people who keep you healthy and alive??

She did not keep him healthy and alive. All she did was treat him rudely and gave him false information. And the op mentioned that she seemed liberal. I think he handled it perfectly. This inexperienced doctor could have a bright future working for Obama where her stupid, irrelevant questions would be right at home.
 

Chadeaux

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I do have a dumb question:

Doesn't anyone else realize that you are being interrogated ILLEGALLY?

Did they inform you of your Miranda Rights before asking for information that might incriminate you?

You know they are keeping all that information because the bureaucrats want it.

Obamacare thrives on data collection.
 

0121stockpicker

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I do have a dumb question:

Doesn't anyone else realize that you are being interrogated ILLEGALLY?

Did they inform you of your Miranda Rights before asking for information that might incriminate you?

You know they are keeping all that information because the bureaucrats want it.

Obamacare thrives on data collection.

This is completely incorrect statement. There is absolutely nothing illegal about this. These discussions are not interrogations and certainly people have the right not to answer. You also have the right to walk right out of the drs office and go somewhere else if you choose. If a dr is treating someone who they feel is completely unstable I for one am very glad if they ask about guns. This is what will prevent the next columbine or sandy hook, etc.


"""Obama Administration: "The Affordable Care Act Does Not Prohibit Or Otherwise Regulate Communication Between Doctors And Patients, Including About Firearms." In a report issued by the White House outlining the Obama administration's proposals to curb gun violence announced on January 16, the administration clarified that doctors are permitted to ask their patients about gun safety but did not create any mandate requiring doctors to do so:

Doctors and other health care providers also need to be able to ask about firearms in their patients' homes and safe storage of those firearms, especially if their patients show signs of certain mental illnesses or if they have a young child or mentally ill family member at home. Some have incorrectly claimed that language in the Affordable Care Act prohibits doctors from asking their patients about guns and gun safety. Medical groups also continue to fight against state laws attempting to ban doctors from asking these questions. The Administration will issue guidance clarifying that the Affordable Care Act does not prohibit or otherwise regulate communication between doctors and patients, including about firearms. [The White House, accessed 1/17/13] """
 

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