NEW CONTEST

[Honest Samuel]

Unlike the rest of you, Tippy and I were really good this year, gold, no poop.

 

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[Hillbilly Prince]

Oh poop. I am last.

 

[13dolphins1]

Unlike the rest of you, Tippy and I were really good this year, gold, no poop.

Good for you Sam...Good for you. How is that infamous Tippy cat doing?
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[sjvalleyhunter]

Whew, what a busy night at work. But it was a 13 hour day so that means 3 hours of overtime! Cha ching! I’m thinking about buying a nice sand scoop for the beach.

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[13dolphins1]

Whew, what a busy night at work. But it was a 13 hour day so that means 3 hours of overtime! Cha ching! I’m thinking about buying a nice sand scoop for the beach.

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You deserve it Valleyclaus....I've been really good this year by the way!
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[against the wind]

GOOD MORNING TNET!!

 

[against the wind]

Valley, if you're going to get a decent sand scoop, consider buying one with a two piece handle
So much easier to transport.

 

[13dolphins1]

Valley, if you're going to get a decent sand scoop, consider buying one with a two piece handle
So much easier to transport.

Great idea wind. Was wondering at one time if they made such a thing.
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[sjvalleyhunter]

Valley, if you're going to get a decent sand scoop, consider buying one with a two piece handle
So much easier to transport.

Do you have any suggestions as to brand?

 

[Hillbilly Prince]

Great idea wind. Was wondering at one time if they made such a thing.
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I had a sand scoop which was perfect for building sand castles while I craftily checked out the chicks.
One morning I scooped up some sand and there was a sand encrusted human finger in the scoop! And there was a gold ring on it with four huge diamonds! Obviously I had found a salt preserved finger from a shipwreck of long ago. I quickly put it in an empty sandwich baggie
As I sat there I felt so good about myself and the world.
Then I was approached by a plump dowager who was carrying a big old Siamese cat with a diamond studded collar.
"Excuse me," she said. "I let my Crinkles out every morning to come and relieve himself on the beach. This morning after he left I niticed my fabulous diamond ring was missing. I noticed you have been building sand castles with your scoop and I wonder if you have come across any cat poop with a ring in it?"
"No," I said. "But I will watch for it." She wandered off and I went back to staring at the cute blonde in the tiny bikini.
Back home I emptied the finger on the kitchen table. I then attempted to gently twist the ring off the finger. But it broke and then the most horrific eye-burning stench assailed my nose. There went my dream of having a three hundred year old finger.
The next morning I lay in wait and caught Crinkles in an unfortunate position, and relieved him of his collar. All in all a good two days.

 

[13dolphins1]

I had a sand scoop which was perfect for building sand castles while I craftily checked out the chicks.
One morning I scooped up some sand and there was a sand encrusted human finger in the scoop! And there was a gold ring on it with four huge diamonds! Obviously I had found a salt preserved finger from a shipwreck of long ago. I quickly put it in an empty sandwich baggie
As I sat there I felt so good about myself and the world.
Then I was approached by a plump dowager who was carrying a big old Siamese cat with a diamond studded collar.
"Excuse me," she said. "I let my Crinkles out every morning to come and relieve himself on the beach. This morning after he left I niticed my fabulous diamond ring was missing. I noticed you have been building sand castles with your scoop and I wonder if you have come across any cat poop with a ring in it?"
"No," I said. "But I will watch for it." She wandered off and I went back to staring at the cute blonde in the tiny bikini.
Back home I emptied the finger on the kitchen table. I then attempted to gently twist the ring off the finger. But it broke and then the most horrific eye-burning stench assailed my nose. There went my dream of having a three hundred year old finger.
The next morning I lay in wait and caught Crinkles in an unfortunate position, and relieved him of his collar. All in all a good two days.

Whew! I was sure glad you went back to get that collar! I was beginning to worry about you for a second.
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[Hillbilly Prince]

Whew! I was sure glad you went back to get that collar! I was beginning to worry about you for a second.
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I ain't no fool. That poop machine had no use for a collar like that.

 

[Honest Samuel]

Good for you Sam...Good for you. How is that infamous Tippy cat doing?
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Tippy is doing great, we just got up, and she finish eating, now my time to eat. And to all, a good Afternoon while I am Last.

 

[13dolphins1]

Here's a question that keeps me awake at night and you all know me, i.am not afraid to give out confidential information...Even when the government show up asking how I know about such and such planet (Nuburon) I always cover my tracks.....so here it goes and please dont be afraid to chime in.
As a child (age 2-3) I was pretty certain Santa was an alien named Crasuntamas, and had fooled everyone into being this Jolly Fellow. I still have not been proved right or wrong on this theory as he always seems to avoid capture. My main question is if Valleyclaus is real, where does he put his reindeer? How does he retrieve them when needed? How does a mere mortal carry this many presents? I'm leaning back to calling Valleyclaus a hoax and back onto Crasuntamus as being the real deal.
Sorry Valley, but my math says you have less than .00133% chance of being a Valleyclaus.
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[Honest Samuel]

My friend, you are total confuse, please get the help that you badly need.

 

[Hillbilly Prince]

Here's a question that keeps me awake at night and you all know me, i.am not afraid to give out confidential information...Even when the government show up asking how I know about such and such planet (Nuburon) I always cover my tracks.....so here it goes and please dont be afraid to chime in.
As a child (age 2-3) I was pretty certain Santa was an alien named Crasuntamas, and had fooled everyone into being this Jolly Fellow. I still have not been proved right or wrong on this theory as he always seems to avoid capture. My main question is if Valleyclaus is real, where does he put his reindeer? How does he retrieve them when needed? How does a mere mortal carry this many presents? I'm leaning back to calling Valleyclaus a hoax and back onto Crasuntamus as being the real deal.
Sorry Valley, but my math says you have less than .00133% chance of being a Valleyclaus.
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Well, I wonder what sort of childhood you had which led you to conclude Santy was an Alien. Although I could see how this whole Christmas thing would make an excellent cover. Santa was born at a time when people did not have internet or flying machines to get to the bottom of things. So you could say people had to accept the story or be labeled scrooges trying to get out of buying presents to help Santa out. By the way, perhaps the goverment was all too willing to let Aliens promote this story because those in the know were scared of the Aliens and buying presents was good for the economy.
But we have not only pictures, drawings and paintings from actual sightings centuries ago, plus we had video evidence from the last century. And there are Reindeer.
Most everyone has seen the video evidence which is clearly not faked.
Valley Clause sounds plausible although I have not actually seen him.
We do know you are from Michigan where much nuclear waste is dumped.

 

[13dolphins1]

Well, I wonder what sort of childhood you had which led you to conclude Santy was an Alien. Although I could see how this whole Christmas thing would make an excellent cover. Santa was born at a time when people did not have internet or flying machines to get to the bottom of things. So you could say people had to accept the story or be labeled scrooges trying to get out of buying presents to help Santa out. By the way, perhaps the goverment was all too willing to let Aliens promote this story because those in the know were scared of the Aliens and buying presents was good for the economy.
But we have not only pictures, drawings and paintings from actual sightings centuries ago, plus we had video evidence from the last century. And there are Reindeer.
Most everyone has seen the video evidence which is clearly not faked.
Valley Clause sounds plausible although I have not actually seen him.
We do know you are from Michigan where much nuclear waste is dumped.

Every large city in the USA have nuclear waste flows under their cities silly...lol. You should plan a week on your next vacation, pick a large city and stay in the sewer system there for one week. It's a great, life changing experience. You will meet CHUD so pack weapons (CHUD=Characteristic Humanoid Underground Dwellers). They made a movie in the 1980's called CHUD that failed at the box office but later it became a cult classic and people realized the realism of the underground. The other great thing that happens after your week long tour is that your urine with glow for months! That's pretty cool.
Dont forget if you pick a city in California you have to pay an Underground Exploration Tax or UET.
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[Honest Samuel]

Poop for al of you. Bags of gold for me and Tippy for being good all year.

 

[13dolphins1]

Poop for al of you. Bags of gold for me and Tippy for being good all year.

Yeah yeah...you can see Connecticut glowing from space as the entire state is filled with nuclear waste.
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[Hillbilly Prince]

Yeah yeah...you can see Connecticut glowing from space as the entire state is filled with nuclear waste.
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Have I got a story for you which I uncovered researching the Seven Caves of Cibola.
But I must say Sam is gonna get coal from Santa and Valley because of his un zChristmassy attitude toward us.