- Jan 6, 2006
- 20,846
- 2,534
- 🏆 Honorable Mentions:
- 1
- Detector(s) used
- Garrett AT Pro, Ace 250 & Ace 400
- Primary Interest:
- All Treasure Hunting
RED SKELTON'S RECIPE FOR THE PERFECT MARRIAGE
>
>
>
> 1. Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little
> beverage, good food and companionship. She goes on Tuesdays, I go on
> Fridays.
>
> 2. We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California and mine is
> in Texas.
>
> 3. I take my wife everywhere.....but she keeps finding her way back.
>
> 4. I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our anniversary.
> "Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said. So I suggested the
> kitchen.
>
> 5. We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.
>
> 6. She has an electric blender, electric toaster and electric bread
> maker. She said "There are too many gadgets and no place to sit down!
> ... So I bought her an electric chair.
>
> 7. My wife told me the car wasn't running well because there was water
> in the carburetor. I asked where the car was; she told me "In the
> lake."
>
> 8. She got a mud pack and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell
> off.
>
> 9. She ran after the garbage truck, yelling "Am I too late for the
> garbage?" .. The driver said "No, jump in!"
>
> 10. Remember: Marriage is the number one cause of divorce.
>
> 11. I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was
> Always.
>
> 12. I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months. I don't like to
> interrupt her.
>
> 13. The last fight was my fault though. My wife asked "What's on the
> TV?" I said "Dust!"
>
>
> Can't you just hear him say all of these? I love it.........this is
> the good old days when humor didn't have to start with a four letter
> word........just clean and simple fun
>
>
>
>
> 1. Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little
> beverage, good food and companionship. She goes on Tuesdays, I go on
> Fridays.
>
> 2. We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California and mine is
> in Texas.
>
> 3. I take my wife everywhere.....but she keeps finding her way back.
>
> 4. I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our anniversary.
> "Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said. So I suggested the
> kitchen.
>
> 5. We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.
>
> 6. She has an electric blender, electric toaster and electric bread
> maker. She said "There are too many gadgets and no place to sit down!
> ... So I bought her an electric chair.
>
> 7. My wife told me the car wasn't running well because there was water
> in the carburetor. I asked where the car was; she told me "In the
> lake."
>
> 8. She got a mud pack and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell
> off.
>
> 9. She ran after the garbage truck, yelling "Am I too late for the
> garbage?" .. The driver said "No, jump in!"
>
> 10. Remember: Marriage is the number one cause of divorce.
>
> 11. I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was
> Always.
>
> 12. I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months. I don't like to
> interrupt her.
>
> 13. The last fight was my fault though. My wife asked "What's on the
> TV?" I said "Dust!"
>
>
> Can't you just hear him say all of these? I love it.........this is
> the good old days when humor didn't have to start with a four letter
> word........just clean and simple fun
>
RR
