Civil_War22, Let me give you some GREAT ADVICE, being I have been on your side of the fence before, (No I wasn't seeing your wife!)
I have been married more than once and many times my spouses ended up cheating. It wasn't the fact I wasn't a loving husband or good intimately. Reasons in todays society the internet has played a MAJOR ROLE in breaking up marriages! Yes, both MEN AND WOMEN live on the internet whether it being at home all day, or right after they get in from work and remain on it for hours instead of spending time with family. When the internet first came out with AOL many spouses cheated and left their spouses for someone they DIDN'T even know much less meet until they actually made plans to "HOOK UP"! Some cases people had "FALLEN IN LOVE" with the person on the other end without ever meeting them, even before cell phones became a major part of our lives!
My last wife was in the Army reserves while at the same time I was in the National Guard. I red handedly caught my wife at the time in the act of sexual contact in the guys pick up, (which was one of her lower ranking soldiers). I had our 2 kids in the car, (ages 2 and 3), and I kindly walked up to his truck with the passenger side door open pair of feet up and a pair of feet down sticking out, said plainly, nice picture while I snapped a photo, and told her don't bother coming home. Of course Texas is a non adultry state so I couldn't do anything but being she was in the service I contacted the Army Advisors office after I called her commander and he plainly said it wasn't his business and what they do after duty is none of his business and he didn't care. I informed him of UCMJ actions with cheating with military spouses agaisnt both of them and he didn't care. So I went to the Army Advisor when I got no where with her commander! The only thing the Army Advisor did was inform her commander that he better make sure it stops and take actions. Which he never did!
We seperated for 2 weeks and she pleaded with me to try and make it work and even agreed to couseling. But I let her back in because I was thinking about the kids needing both parents. We went to couseling and when I spoke up of all the things she did and me catching her in the act, she would always storm out and would never face her faults and interrupted everytime I said something when the couselor wanted me to talk. So a year and a half I had a "room mate" and she refused to change units, never slept in bed with me since I let her back in, never tended to the kids except pick them up from day care, I was the one who fed and bathed them, and did everything with them when I got in from work. She didn't do anything except tell them good night!
Well all it did was buy her time, which I later found out, her mom and dad, (both of which never liked me to begin with because I wouldn't "BOW DOWN" to them, and they paid all her attorney fees and bought out the judge a year and a half later. I lost the house everything to include not seeing my children for a year during our seperation, then they gave me supervised visitation once a month for 5 hours for no reason at all!
Yeah, I had 2 attorneys because the first one resigned from representing me because everything I had that was admissible in court the judge denied. Only figured because her daddy bought out the judge!
So I DO NOT know what state you live in and being your wife has been doing this you have to make a choice which will be tough, but if you want your sanity you have to make the RIGHT CHOICE!
You either EXCEPT the fact your wife is cheating and live with it! Or you take actions to file for divorce, (MAKE SURE YOU HAVE DOCUMENTED EVIDENCE, PHOTOS, HIRE A PRIVATE INVESTIGATOR TO GET VIDEOS, Buy a key logger for your computer to see excatly what she IS saying and doing on the computer and to whom, buy a spy program you can get for any cell phone to listen in on actual phone conversations, recieve text messages from both, emails, etc. Then get all your evidence, kick her out, file for divorce, get custody of your kids and make her pay you child support!
Quit being "MR NICE GUY"! Things are NOT GOING TO CHANGE and SHE CERTAINLY ISNT GOING TO CHANGE, because you caught her before and let her stay, so of course she KNOWS you will not doing anything hense the reason she ISN'T GOING TO CHANGE OR STOP!
Word of advice, NO MATTER HOW MANY TIMES SHE TELLS YOU SHE WILL CHANGE TO PREVENT FROM LOSING IT ALL, IGNORE IT BECAUSE SHE IS ONLY SEEING YOU AS A "SUCKER"!
Please don't take offense to anything I said here. It isn't meant to be offensive, I am just telling you the truth!
Some states are adultry states and if you live in one, you can certainly bet YOU WILL GET EVERYTHING TO INCLUDE HOUSE AND THE KIDS! And you can have her SUPERVISED while she sees the kids!
You can find someone better, if not, you just raise your kids and let people see you as the BEST DAD ANY KIDS COULD HAVE!
I will say I will NEVER marry again. Yeah I said NEVER and I WILL NEVER. My philosophy is, "Better to live in sin, than to be married in hell"! At least when it doesn't work out, you make them pack their bags! Oh, on that note, STAY OUT OF COMMON LAW STATES!!!!!!!
Hope this all helps you!
