CRISPINS CRITTERS

[AU24K]

Been in bunkerville a few days now..questioning life ? Yeah and wondering if I have the nads to do what I planned out, since it involves more than just myself, its a rough path I am on at the moment. However its more about being merciful than anything else, at least since I made that statement about who am I ? Took a night of soul searching to realize that I am indeed insane, for no sane person would even remotely consider what I have been contemplating the last few weeks, what's worse, these thoughts don't bother me in the least bit. It would be different if she was not so ill and I knew there would be somebody after I am gone to take care of her..but that's not an available option. So I guess I'll just sit here and think about this some more, only thing that is causing me distress at this moment is contemplating what it will be like to be judged by the creator if I go through with this, I know where I will end up, but love and compassion goes beyond eternal damnation. I really have a lot on my mind, so much grief from my past, so much hatred, its really a miracle I have sustained it all this long. Makes me want to revisit that old saying that it is better to have loved, versus never have had experienced love to begin with...I really used to believe that but to watch the one you love the most, slowly go downhill, to watch and feel their pain, to listen to their cries of agony during the night..I wish under those circumstances I had never loved somebody for the emotional toll it is taking upon me is unbearable, maybe a normal person could navigate these circumstances, but I am definitely not normal..guess its all trials and tribulations, well one man can only take so much. One thing before I leave this world behind for the next, and I have never asked him what he thinks about it, but I would really like to know the riddle behind..ever wonder where your thoughts come from ?...yes I would very much like to know!. Start with why is it when I look at things like a bottle of bleach, do I see myself drinking it ? Or how about why do I suffer from such violent thoughts ? I hate those thoughts, and no matter how much I beg it to stop, no matter how hard I pray, no matter how much I beg God to makes those thoughts stop, they only get worse and more vivid/lucid. So please, where do my thoughts come from ? Why do they torture me to the point to where I lock myself in a bathroom and cry for hours, afraid of the fact that I could act on those thoughts?? Is this just my life, I cannot imagine that a existence such as this is part of a grand plan, for if it is I have come to the conclusion that the afterlife cannot be any worse than what the hell this wreck that is my life is. Where does this illness come from ? My uncle ? Because of the things I endured as a child for 3 years ? Was it the lead pipes in our house that our water ran through ? What!!! Was it being in that place called Fairlawn psych hospital from the age of 11 to age 14 that did it ? Or is it just my tiny part of the plan..42 years of misery is too much to bear any longer. If anybody reads this I'll be surprised, this is more a note for other loved ones to read when I send them the email as to why this happened. Well I could go on forever with this, for my life has been..ahh what's it matter.

I was reading the posts of the last few days,
taking notes for a massive reply initiative to many,
when I came to this.

My first thought was: Are meds currently involved?
If so, which?
Followed by knowledge of episodic history of juvenile, adolescent and recent manifestations.

BC,
I noticed earlier that you said that you were a "long way from home,"
and was going to reply...
Yep, there it is in my notes, post #12563.
Many here are a long way from "home."
We've been all around.
Perhaps we were once in the same town at the same time and didn't even know it!

I'm swapping coins with a fella in California and come to find out he's got a niece livin' in my current home of Gainesville, GA.
And,

Friend,
My "home" is wherever I am, as long as I'm with Friends.
Therefore, I have many homes.
Tnet is one of my homes.
Because you are my Friend as well as many others here.

I can identify with your thoughts;
Many of my maternal side have attempted/committed suicide.
Including me.
More than once.

Some would ask, "Why?"
My reply was, "Why not?"

The word "tomorrow" holds so much promise to those who will seek to achieve goals.
The same word holds dread and loathing to those who feel "no gain, only more pain."

A persons' environment also plays into their state of mind.
Do you live in your car?
Do you live under the bridge because you have no car?
I know of both of these situations.

And maybe one of the most important aspects of a persons' "well-being" is diet.
Lord knows that I've had my share of popcorn and ramen for dinner,
and, have even "dumpster-dived" behind a restaurant for the night's dinner.



I could go on, trying to relate and offer "internet advice,"
But I'll not.

If you wish to communicate further, in confidence, please PM me.

Here,
Always for my Friends,

Scott
​

 

[AU24K]

Man, now I,m wet, cold and some guy called me Sandy, somehow, I think. At least it wasn,t Shirley.

RC,
You knew it would be me to "spin this disc."



Best,

Scott​

 

[Togreenfeet]

Navy SEAL Training: Self-Confidence - David Rutherford - Google Books

Start your day cold, wet and sandy............I DO...........This is especially for RC.....just click

 

[AU24K]

By the way....
Skool update...

http://www.treasurenet.com/forums/au24k/290025-school-5.html#post3880354
(post #372)

Best,

Scott

 

[releventchair]

Two gre en feet sandy sugar cookie. in Florida. Here the hose is froze and the sugar melts after you flop around in it.

 

[Togreenfeet]

Hehehe

Sent from my iPhone using TreasureNet

 

[AU24K]

Two gre en feet sandy sugar cookie. in Florida. Here the hose is froze and the sugar melts after you flop around in it. View attachment 954665View attachment 954666

Stop it! Too many memories.... LOL. Scott PS. I'm never one to leave my brother or sister.... Are you ready? It's no wonder that Congress hasn't approved a medal for Cold War Victory." Here we are again. Dang...Skirtin' politics again.... The future is in your hands.... Best, Scott​

 

[AU24K]

Stop it! Too many memories.... LOL. Scott PS. I'm never one to leave my brother or sister....

Mods! Do you see this posting travesty?! Now then, I'll clean it up and put a dress on the pig....

Stop it! Too many memories....
LOL.
Scott

PS. I'm never one to leave my brother or sister....

Mods! Do you see this posting travesty?!
Now then, I'll clean it up and put a dress on the pig....

The question begs....
Is this worth the message?

I am surely (RC, Shirley....)
just about done with the hassles in posting and editing.

I may have bigger fish to fry......



Your town fool,

Scott​

 

[AU24K]

Do y'all Mods and site need peeps to help write HTML? {wink} Let me know.... Best, Scott

 

[AU24K]

Mods! Do you see this posting travesty?! Now then, I'll clean it up and put a dress on the pig....

Mods! Do you see this posting travesty?! Now then, I'll clean it up and put a dress on the pig.... The question begs.... Is this worth the message? I am surely (RC, Shirley....) just about done with the hassles in posting and editing. I may have bigger fish to fry...... Your town fool, Scott​

​

(cue Barb....)


Fact: Pigs are more clean than most humans!

Best,

Scott

Up to a couple of hundred pounds, pics are so cuddly.
After that weight,
I'm thinkin' BACON!​

 

[AU24K]

Mods! Do you see this posting travesty?! Now then, I'll clean it up and put a dress on the pig....

Mods! Do you see this posting travesty?! Now then, I'll clean it up and put a dress on the pig.... The question begs.... Is this worth the message? I am surely (RC, Shirley....) just about done with the hassles in posting and editing. I may have bigger fish to fry...... Your town fool, Scott​

Reminds me of a story an "old-timer" told me when I was young.....
"Folks would come from far and wide to see the town fool.
When offered the choice of many pennies and nickles over a silver dollar, the fool would choose the pennies.
One day, a "city slicker" asked the fool, " You could make more by choosing the silver dollar."
Whereupon the fool replied, "I make more by choosing the pennies. Who would offer a silver dollar if I chose it?"

The fool cannot be underestimated.
Those who seek "survival mentality" overlook the use of a fool.
Who's gonna try that red berry? Or that water from the stream?
I think that you now understand the role of a fool.

Don't be a fool.

Best,

Scott​

 

[releventchair]

Garth cover it seems.

 

[AU24K]

Reminds me of a story an "old-timer" told me when I was young..... "Folks would come from far and wide to see the town fool. When offered the choice of many pennies and nickles over a silver dollar, the fool would choose the pennies. One day, a "city slicker" asked the fool, " You could make more by choosing the silver dollar." Whereupon the fool replied, "I make more by choosing the pennies. Who would offer a silver dollar if I chose it?" The fool cannot be underestimated. Those who seek "survival mentality" overlook the use of a fool. Who's gonna try that red berry? Or that water from the stream? I think that you now understand the role of a fool. Don't be a fool. Best, Scott​

And.........

This has to do with College courses, HOW?


"GET BACK TO STUDYING!"


"Look, ya old bag, I got this, dig?"



If not, I'm welcome in maybe 6-8 different countries.....



Best,

Scott

 

[AU24K]

Ah, Tina. Sweeter than Ginger or Maryann...

The blond bassist in the previous vid.

Best,

Scott​

 

[AU24K]

Shall we return to reality?

I have made an appointment with my academic advisor on the final 2 classes needed for my degree.

Of course, her availability does not correspond to my presence on campus.
Therefore, I must make accommodations to her schedule.

And I will still win.

Her recommendations, my abilities will surely clash....
I know for a fact that I need "Statistics" and one other science based course.
Meteorology? Geography?

I'm surely looking forward to her "recommendations."

Best,

Scott

 

[AU24K]

Seems that we are kindred, my Brother....

Best,

Scott

 

[AU24K]

Have y'all ever heard of Kevin Sharp?
Back years ago, I heard this on a radio station when he was being "promoted."
I was ahead of the game. IN "COUNTRY MUSIC!"



Kevin Sharp - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Always just a bit ahead....

Scott

 

[AU24K]

Have y'all ever heard of Kevin Sharp? Back years ago, I heard this on a radio station when he was being "promoted." I was ahead of the game. IN "COUNTRY MUSIC!" Kevin Sharp - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia Always just a bit ahead.... Scott

The "commercial" version of the same song....



"There is life in his eyes when I play music."

My Best,

Scott

 

[AU24K]

The "commercial" version of the same song.... "There is life in his eyes when I play music." My Best, Scott

Y'all understand, right?

Best,

Scott​

 

[AU24K]

Study music?
Maybe.
Probably.
Certainly.

And, if you had to study for classes, what would you want to hear?
Or play on your guitar?
Or be inspired to write a song?
Me?
MUSIC!

Almost any genre!
How about this oldie?

or perhaps this recent version of basically the same song....


Crap.; I was just told that I may think too much.... So, I'll sign off....

Best,

Scott​