CRISPINS CRITTERS

AU24K · Apr 8, 2014

Went to my math test.
Drew a blank.
Turned in a blank test.

Seriously thinking of quitting.

School.

I'm too old.
Can't remember anything anymore.

Who cares anyway?

Scott

dieselram94 · Apr 8, 2014

AU24K said:
Went to my math test.
Drew a blank.
Turned in a blank test.

Seriously thinking of quitting.

School.

I'm too old.
Can't remember anything anymore.

Who cares anyway?

Scott

Never to old. Just had a bad day...

sent from a potato...

AU24K · Apr 8, 2014

Dram my Friend,

The "bad day" thought has crossed my mind....

I have decided against unregistering for Fall.
For now.

I might at least finish this semester.....

From National Honors to the trashcan.....

Again, the roller coaster of my life is on the down skid.

Bipolarism?
Yes, I believe so.....

However, the only "saving grace" that I see is in Tomorrow.
Again.

The worn-out promise of "a better day."

I feel as a bird with broken wing....

I question my ability to help others when I struggle so much myself....

I will never lose my passion to be a friend to all and help whenever I can,
But,
I feel such a low value of my abilities....

I'm sorry for being a "downer" but I have no one to talk with; only my Friends here.

I probably must face the fact that I'm getting old and my faculties are not as they once were.
My body is reminding me of the aging process,
and,
As much as I try to deny it,
Nevertheless, it remains a fact.

The stresses of academia have taken an obvious toll on my health in the last year,
and I have lied to myself, denying the aging process accelerated by the additional stress.

I long for times in my mountains, swinging my beep stick in a tot lot and having little else to worry about.

Sheesh....

Was SO close.....

Scott

Otis is disappointed....asks, "Why?"

Togreenfeet · Apr 8, 2014

Scotty it was just one day bro........ You can't quit now sweet victory is at your fingertips. Hang in there friend " tighten up soldier and drive on quitting is not an option" there did I remind you of your drill Sgt? I know you still remember his name. We all do. One person we will never forget. Drive on its just cold, wet and sandy right now, drive on my friend!!!!!

Sent from my iPhone using TreasureNet

AU24K · Apr 8, 2014

Togreenfeet said:
Scotty it was just one day bro........ You can't quit now sweet victory is at your fingertips. Hang in there friend " tighten up soldier and drive on quitting is not an option" there did I remind you of your drill Sgt? I know you still remember his name. We all do. One person we will never forget. Drive on its just cold, wet and sandy right now, drive on my friend!!!!!

Sent from my iPhone using TreasureNet

TGF,

Yes,
I do remember.....
From 1977....

My DI's names were:
Master Sergeant Sullinger, (Snake)
1st Sgt. Jones, (TJ)
and 1st Sgt. Robinson, (fat boy)

The spirit is willing.....

Thanks, Friend.

Scott

bill from lachine · Apr 8, 2014

Scott,

Don't sell yourself short.....try at the very least to finish the semester.

If after the semester you feel it's still time to move on to something else..... well that's your call but at least try to close the file so to speak on this section of the course.

In the end you know what's best for yourself....there's still lots of ways you can help others in a volunteer role without having the sheepskin if that's what you choose.

Regards + HH

Bill

releventchair · Apr 8, 2014

Well Scott ,are we where we are because we want to be there?(my opinion absolutely not).A day in the life ehh?
I have not approached the V.A. and did not enroll in the rehab hospitals mentor program due to its distant city location. Poor excuse but better than none. I did put the word out to some local veterans to look me up if someone they encounter returning disabled needs someone to fight going forward with even if its only to vent. I,m not a vet so that,s a big factor in relate ability though it does not bother me. I,ll take wanting to help over a degree to a reasonable point depending on issues. You and I may not be case hardened enough for the worst life can dish out to others but that,s not proven in your case and we know there are cases we have no business even being near.Plus the legalities and inherent risks of any doings with people.. Somethings are beyond our non degree,d professionalism but a heck of a lot of things are not. Coping skills of a returning vet,work,cloths,bills,cooking,a place to live are sometimes overwhelming in addition to reintroduction to "society". Not so unlike good morning you are now disabled. While we would not see much money out of it I am fully confident you and I as a team could help people who have been where we are and could use a little ,I know what you mean because I have been there support. And how are you today and what else is going on/ Lets do something that moves you forward because you can do so if you want to. Or we can quit. You know its tough to persuade a quitter to quit quitting, like pushing a nonfrozen unstarched rope or putting toothpaste back in a tube I want to help someone who wants help.
If you feel old feel old be the age you want but I might miss class let alone arrive in a dysfunctional state. I care about your test. What the.. Did your instructor ask whats up and offer a solution? You got to fight a little on your end or yes get out of school and float down stream with the other non swimmers.( tough love brother).

AU24K · Apr 8, 2014

bill from lachine said:
Scott,

Don't sell yourself short.....try at the very least to finish the semester.

If after the semester you feel it's still time to move on to something else..... well that's your call but at least try to close the file so to speak on this section of the course.

In the end you know what's best for yourself....there's still lots of ways you can help others in a volunteer role without having the sheepskin if that's what you choose.

Regards + HH

Bill

Bill, my Friend,

I have committed myself to at least finishing this semester,
and whatever grades I make, if passing,
will be the possible ending of my belated attempt at a college degree.

In doing so, I leave open the door to completing my degree, at a later date,
if that is what I feel is important to me.

I may end up with the passion without the credentials....

Thank you for opining....I treasure all replies.....

Scott

GMD52 · Apr 8, 2014

Buck up my friend, in life we all have to prepare to fail, and not be surprised when it happens....failure is nothing more than an awakeaning, and the challenge to do the task over, and complete it. In my recouperation, which is way too slow, I've been relearning calculus and solid geometry, which I haven't touched for 40 years, since I left collage......you're only as old as you feel, and your mind will show no bounds...granted I am a little more philosophical in these matters after coming close to leaving this world a couple months ago.....but it's what it is, and we play the card we're dealt with, and never give up......good luck........Gary

AU24K · Apr 8, 2014

releventchair said:
Well Scott ,are we where we are because we want to be there?(my opinion absolutely not).A day in the life ehh?
I have not approached the V.A. and did not enroll in the rehab hospitals mentor program due to its distant city location. Poor excuse but better than none. I did put the word out to some local veterans to look me up if someone they encounter returning disabled needs someone to fight going forward with even if its only to vent. I,m not a vet so that,s a big factor in relate ability though it does not bother me. I,ll take wanting to help over a degree to a reasonable point depending on issues. You and I may not be case hardened enough for the worst life can dish out to others but that,s not proven in your case and we know there are cases we have no business even being near.Plus the legalities and inherent risks of any doings with people.. Somethings are beyond our non degree,d professionalism but a heck of a lot of things are not. Coping skills of a returning vet,work,cloths,bills,cooking,a place to live are sometimes overwhelming in addition to reintroduction to "society". Not so unlike good morning you are now disabled. While we would not see much money out of it I am fully confident you and I as a team could help people who have been where we are and could use a little ,I know what you mean because I have been there support. And how are you today and what else is going on/ Lets do something that moves you forward because you can do so if you want to. Or we can quit. You know its tough to persuade a quitter to quit quitting, like pushing a nonfrozen unstarched rope or putting toothpaste back in a tube I want to help someone who wants help.
If you feel old feel old be the age you want but I might miss class let alone arrive in a dysfunctional state. I care about your test. What the.. Did your instructor ask whats up and offer a solution? You got to fight a little on your end or yes get out of school and float down stream with the other non swimmers.( tough love brother).

RC,
You may be my best Friend here,
and I've always believed in your Friendship and advice....

I'd like not to think of myself as a quitter.....

However, everyone has their limitations.

My goal, as you cleverly pointed out, is to help other Veterans.

But right now, I feel as though I'm the one who needs help.

I've never sought psychiatric help because I wanted no part of such on any medical record,
and felt that I've always had to "look out for myself."

I've investigated research studies indicating treatment for Bipolarism and have found that commonly prescribed medications always preclude a psychiatric evaluation.

Not going there.

Just between my Friends and I,
My only sibling, my sister, 18 months older, is on anti-anxiety medication and receives disability checks from the Government, and has been, for at least 10 years.

The "frozen rope" and "toothpaste back in the tube" references brought a rare smile to my face today....

Thank You!

We all need our Friends,
and Friends,

I need you....

Scott

AU24K · Apr 8, 2014

I feel like cutting my hair.

Short.

Myself.

(A form of self-mutilation?)

I beg your pardon,

Just having a personal little breakdown....

{see? I told ya there's a song for every thought and feeling....}

Forever,

My Best Wishes,

Scott

releventchair · Apr 8, 2014

I probably don,t want to know what percentage of the people I see are on meds affecting their minds. However.. Wait, there was a goal related to growing some long hair was there not? :icon_scratch:

AU24K · Apr 8, 2014

releventchair said:
Well Scott ,are we where we are because we want to be there?(my opinion absolutely not).A day in the life ehh?
I have not approached the V.A. and did not enroll in the rehab hospitals mentor program due to its distant city location. Poor excuse but better than none. I did put the word out to some local veterans to look me up if someone they encounter returning disabled needs someone to fight going forward with even if its only to vent. I,m not a vet so that,s a big factor in relate ability though it does not bother me. I,ll take wanting to help over a degree to a reasonable point depending on issues. You and I may not be case hardened enough for the worst life can dish out to others but that,s not proven in your case and we know there are cases we have no business even being near.Plus the legalities and inherent risks of any doings with people.. Somethings are beyond our non degree,d professionalism but a heck of a lot of things are not. Coping skills of a returning vet,work,cloths,bills,cooking,a place to live are sometimes overwhelming in addition to reintroduction to "society". Not so unlike good morning you are now disabled. While we would not see much money out of it I am fully confident you and I as a team could help people who have been where we are and could use a little ,I know what you mean because I have been there support. And how are you today and what else is going on/ Lets do something that moves you forward because you can do so if you want to. Or we can quit. You know its tough to persuade a quitter to quit quitting, like pushing a nonfrozen unstarched rope or putting toothpaste back in a tube I want to help someone who wants help.
If you feel old feel old be the age you want but I might miss class let alone arrive in a dysfunctional state. I care about your test. What the.. Did your instructor ask whats up and offer a solution? You got to fight a little on your end or yes get out of school and float down stream with the other non swimmers.( tough love brother).

RC,
Re-reading your post has shown me wisdom that perhaps only you and I share;

..",are we where we are because we want to be there?"

Yes, I want to be here, so close as to taste success.

"A day in the life ehh?"

Yes, another day on the "roller-coaster..."

"Poor excuse but better than none."

"You got to fight a little on your end or yes get out of school and float down stream with the other non swimmers.( tough love brother)."

RC,
Sorry for grabbing your comments out of context,

But,

Somehow, I can see what you are saying.....

Your missive will be highly considered towards my progression forward.

Think I'll re-read your reply again....

Best,

Scott

releventchair · Apr 8, 2014

Hang in there friends. Theres some all right out there yet! Change hats for a little bit sometimes is all. Well here anyway. :laughing7:

AU24K · Apr 8, 2014

releventchair said:
Hang in there friends. Theres some all right out there yet! Change hats for a little bit sometimes is all. Well here anyway.

{Ich verstehe, mein Freund.}

Best,

Scott

AU24K · Apr 8, 2014

I'll not cut my hair. Today.
Instead, I'll remove the bands which hold and restrain it,
shake it out, find steady footing, and prepare for tomorrow.

The strength I need for today has been found.

Tomorrow,
I may need help again....

But,
Friends,

If you will be here for me today, I'll be there for you tomorrow!

My Best,

Scott

releventchair · Apr 8, 2014

Ever quit? Ever fear quitting and not knowing how close you might have been? Ever drag yourself along wondering why? Good. I know I got it good because I know some who don,t and when I visit there is no personal complaint that would come out right or deserve to be aired in their presence. Still need an incentive to have faith in tomorrow every night. That,s good to. Cause if you can look up you can try to get up.

releventchair · Apr 8, 2014

All right one more tune, make it two and I better quit. How to imitate Jerry Reed on computer when its not known how to type properly. Try.

Set out on em Amos,make it count sohhnnn!

I need a southern visit. Even if its just for nostalgia.

bill from lachine · Apr 8, 2014

Folks,

Here's another tune for you from the Great White North....

Blue Rodeo - Till I am myself again.

AU24K · Apr 8, 2014

releventchair said:
All right one more tune, make it two and I better quit. How to imitate Jerry Reed on computer when its not known how to type properly. Try.

Set out on em Amos,make it count sohhnnn!

I need a southern visit. Even if its just for nostalgia.