DANGLANGLEY
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Subject: Military Rules of Engagement
> Marine Corps Rules:
> 1. Be courteous to everyone, friendly to no one.
> 2. Decide to be aggressive enough, quickly enough.
> 3. Have a plan.
> 4. Have a back-up plan, because the first
> one probably won't work.
> 5. Be polite. Be professional. But, have a
> plan to kill everyone you meet.
> 6. Do not attend a gunfight with a handgun
> whose caliber does not start with .4.
> 7. Anything worth shooting is worth
> shooting twice. Ammo is cheap. Life
> is expensive.
> 8. Move away from your attacker. Distance
> is your friend. (Lateral and diagonal
> preferred.)
> 9. Use cover or concealment as much
> as possible.
> 10. Flank your adversary when possible.
> Protect yours.
> 11. Always cheat; always win. The only
> unfair fight is the one you lose.
> 12. In ten years nobody will remember the
> details of caliber, stance, or tactics.
> They will only remember who lived.
> 13. If you are not shooting, you should be
> communicating your intention to
> shoot.
>
>
> Navy SEAL's Rules:
> 1. Look very cool in sunglasses.
> 2. Kill every living thing within view.
> 3. Adjust Speedo.
> 4. Check hair in mirror.
> 5. Leave signs on the beach reminding
> Marines to duck when they hear BANG.
>
>
> US Army Rangers Rules:
> 1. Walk in 50 miles wearing 75 pound
> rucksack while starving.
> 2. Locate individuals requiring killing.
> 3. Request permission via radio from
> 'Higher' to perform killing.
> 4. Curse bitterly when mission is aborted.
> 5. Walk out 50 miles wearing a
> 75 pound rucksack while starving.
>
>
> US Army Rules:
> 1. Curse bitterly when receiving operational order.
> 2. Make sure there is extra ammo and extra coffee.
> 3. Curse bitterly.
> 4. Again, Curse bitterly.
> 5. Do not listen to 2nd LTs;
> they can get you killed.
> 6. Curse bitterly.
>
> US Air Force Rules*
> 1. Have a cocktail.
> 2. Adjust temperature on air-conditioner.
> 3. See what's on HBO.
> 4. Ask what is a gunfight?
> 5. Request more funding from Congress
> with a 'killer' Power Point presentation.
> 6. Wine & dine ''key' Congressmen, invite
> DOD & defense industry executives.
> 7. Receive funding, set up new command
> and assemble assets.
> 8. Declare the assets 'strategic' and never
> deploy them operationally.
> 9. Hurry to make 13:45 tee-time.
> 10. Make sure the base is as far as possible
> from the conflict but close enough to
> have tax exemption.
>
> US Navy Rules:
> 1. Go to Sea.
> 2. Drink Coffee.
> 3 Deploy the Marines. Go Navy !
>
>
> And the next...? You've got to love the military, All: U.S.
> Navy Directive 16134
> (Inappropriate T-Shirts) =0A
> The following directive was issued by the
> commanding officer of all naval installations
> in the Middle East . (It was obviously directed
> at the Marines.)
>
> To: All Commands Subject: Inappropriate T-Shirts
> Ref: ComMidEast For Inst 16134//24K
> All commanders promulgate upon receipt.
> The following T-shirts are no longer to be worn
> on or off base by any military or civilian
> personnel serving in the Middle East :
>
>
> 1. 'Eat Pork or Die' [both English and
> Arabic versions]
> 2. 'Shrine Busters' [Show burning minarets
> or artillery shells impacting Islamic
> shrines. Some with unit logos.]
> 3. 'Napalm, Sticks Like Crazy' [Both English
> and Arabic versions]
> 4. 'Goat - it isn't just for breakfast
> any more.' [Both English and Arabic
> versions]
> 5. 'The road to Paradise begins with me.'
> [Arabic versions, some in English. Some
> show sniper scope cross-hairs.]
> 6. 'Guns don't kill people. I kill people.'
> [Both Arabic and English versions]
> 7. 'Pork. The other white meat.' [Arabic version]
> 8. 'Infidel'? [English, Arabic and other
> coalition force languages.]
>
> The above T-shirts are to be removed from
> Post Exchanges upon receipt of this directive.
> In addition, the following signs are to be
> removed upon receipt of this message:
> 1. 'Islamic Religious Services Will Be Held
> at the Firing Range at 0800 Daily.'
> 2. 'Do we really need 'smart bombs' to drop
> on these dumb bas tards?
> Marine Corps Rules:
> 1. Be courteous to everyone, friendly to no one.
> 2. Decide to be aggressive enough, quickly enough.
> 3. Have a plan.
> 4. Have a back-up plan, because the first
> one probably won't work.
> 5. Be polite. Be professional. But, have a
> plan to kill everyone you meet.
> 6. Do not attend a gunfight with a handgun
> whose caliber does not start with .4.
> 7. Anything worth shooting is worth
> shooting twice. Ammo is cheap. Life
> is expensive.
> 8. Move away from your attacker. Distance
> is your friend. (Lateral and diagonal
> preferred.)
> 9. Use cover or concealment as much
> as possible.
> 10. Flank your adversary when possible.
> Protect yours.
> 11. Always cheat; always win. The only
> unfair fight is the one you lose.
> 12. In ten years nobody will remember the
> details of caliber, stance, or tactics.
> They will only remember who lived.
> 13. If you are not shooting, you should be
> communicating your intention to
> shoot.
>
>
> Navy SEAL's Rules:
> 1. Look very cool in sunglasses.
> 2. Kill every living thing within view.
> 3. Adjust Speedo.
> 4. Check hair in mirror.
> 5. Leave signs on the beach reminding
> Marines to duck when they hear BANG.
>
>
> US Army Rangers Rules:
> 1. Walk in 50 miles wearing 75 pound
> rucksack while starving.
> 2. Locate individuals requiring killing.
> 3. Request permission via radio from
> 'Higher' to perform killing.
> 4. Curse bitterly when mission is aborted.
> 5. Walk out 50 miles wearing a
> 75 pound rucksack while starving.
>
>
> US Army Rules:
> 1. Curse bitterly when receiving operational order.
> 2. Make sure there is extra ammo and extra coffee.
> 3. Curse bitterly.
> 4. Again, Curse bitterly.
> 5. Do not listen to 2nd LTs;
> they can get you killed.
> 6. Curse bitterly.
>
> US Air Force Rules*
> 1. Have a cocktail.
> 2. Adjust temperature on air-conditioner.
> 3. See what's on HBO.
> 4. Ask what is a gunfight?
> 5. Request more funding from Congress
> with a 'killer' Power Point presentation.
> 6. Wine & dine ''key' Congressmen, invite
> DOD & defense industry executives.
> 7. Receive funding, set up new command
> and assemble assets.
> 8. Declare the assets 'strategic' and never
> deploy them operationally.
> 9. Hurry to make 13:45 tee-time.
> 10. Make sure the base is as far as possible
> from the conflict but close enough to
> have tax exemption.
>
> US Navy Rules:
> 1. Go to Sea.
> 2. Drink Coffee.
> 3 Deploy the Marines. Go Navy !
>
>
> And the next...? You've got to love the military, All: U.S.
> Navy Directive 16134
> (Inappropriate T-Shirts) =0A
> The following directive was issued by the
> commanding officer of all naval installations
> in the Middle East . (It was obviously directed
> at the Marines.)
>
> To: All Commands Subject: Inappropriate T-Shirts
> Ref: ComMidEast For Inst 16134//24K
> All commanders promulgate upon receipt.
> The following T-shirts are no longer to be worn
> on or off base by any military or civilian
> personnel serving in the Middle East :
>
>
> 1. 'Eat Pork or Die' [both English and
> Arabic versions]
> 2. 'Shrine Busters' [Show burning minarets
> or artillery shells impacting Islamic
> shrines. Some with unit logos.]
> 3. 'Napalm, Sticks Like Crazy' [Both English
> and Arabic versions]
> 4. 'Goat - it isn't just for breakfast
> any more.' [Both English and Arabic
> versions]
> 5. 'The road to Paradise begins with me.'
> [Arabic versions, some in English. Some
> show sniper scope cross-hairs.]
> 6. 'Guns don't kill people. I kill people.'
> [Both Arabic and English versions]
> 7. 'Pork. The other white meat.' [Arabic version]
> 8. 'Infidel'? [English, Arabic and other
> coalition force languages.]
>
> The above T-shirts are to be removed from
> Post Exchanges upon receipt of this directive.
> In addition, the following signs are to be
> removed upon receipt of this message:
> 1. 'Islamic Religious Services Will Be Held
> at the Firing Range at 0800 Daily.'
> 2. 'Do we really need 'smart bombs' to drop
> on these dumb bas tards?
