Mr Jack Schitt

texan connection

Silver Member
Sep 3, 2006
4,560
79
Texas
Detector(s) used
Minlabe SE, ace 250, fisher 1280x
Who is Jack Schitt?



For some time many of us have wondered just who is Jack Schitt? We find ourselves at a loss when someone says, “You don’t know Jack Schitt!” Well, thanks to genealogy efforts, you can now respond in an intellectual way.



Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt. Awe Schitt was married to O. Schitt, the fertilizer magnate and owner of Needeep N. Schitt, Inc. They had one son, Jack.

In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. The deeply religious couple produced six children: Holi Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt.

Against her parents’ objections, Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout.

After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later married Ted Sherlock and because her kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known as Noe Schitt-Sherlock.

Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt and they produced a son with a rather nervous disposition who was nick-named Chicken Schitt.

Two of the other six children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were inseparable throughout childhood and Subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony. The wedding announcement in the paper announced the Schitt-Happens nuptials. The Schitt Happens children were Dawg, Byrd and Horse.

Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt.



Now when someone says, “You don’t know Jack Schitt!” you can correct them. AND THAT”S A LOT OF SHIT!!



Sincerely,



Crock O. Schitt
 

boogeyman

Gold Member
Jun 6, 2006
5,016
4,400
Out in the hills near wherendaheckarwe
Detector(s) used
WHITES, MINELAB, Garrett
Primary Interest:
All Treasure Hunting
As teens we used to go into the High end restaurants and use the payphone (remember those?) to call the same restaurant. We'd ask if they could page a mister Mehoff. The receptionist would almost always ask for his first name. We'd say Jack. Don't know how many times we laughed ourselves to tears when she realized halfway through saying his name the second time what she'd said.
 

Top Member Reactions

Users who are viewing this thread

Top