Things not to say on a first date

[spartacus53]

I think it's time to educate the masses and perhaps get a tip, or two myself....

Please feel free to add anything you have experienced


Does this handkerchief smell like chloroform to you?

 

[bigscoop]

Yes, it's an impressive place to eat dinner. In fact, I bring all my other dates here too!

 

[poorhunter78]

So Spart, Mcd's took down the dollar menu, Where to now!

 

[gleaner1]

You look great. Ok, a little about myself, I'm unemployed and live with my parents. I metal detect, and dig for old bottles.

 

[boogeyman]

Pardon me...... What was your name again?

Oh Jeeze, forgot my walet.

 

[nsdq]

howdy sis been awhile

 

[spartacus53]

That's a nice purple dress. Come back to my place and I'll peel you like a grape

 

[poorhunter78]

That's a nice purple dress. Come back to my place and I'll peel you like a grape

Spart!!! You got the Hots for Barney, Woof

 

[Marc(NB)]

gezz for a fat girl you done sweat much!

 

[bigscoop]

gezz for a fat girl you done sweat much!

Now that could end up putting a whole new meaning to, "Blind Date".

 

[stefen]

gezz for a fat girl you done sweat much!

Roll her in flour and look for the wet spot

 

[Nickleanddime]

Say hi to your sister for me.

 

[BrisJoe]

Here is the top 100 things not to say for both men and wemen lol

Worst 100 Things to say on a First Date - Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

Why would I move out of my parents’ house? I love it there!”

"I think I should get this out of the way. I like kids. Like, really like kids." - This should be followed by the Pedosmile

"My greatest achievement is reaching level 90 on World of Warcraft."

"Damn, I can't believe I got a real date. When I get home, my mom is going to be SO proud..."

(if she is a vegan) "You're a vegetarian? Thats great, I love animals too! And its great, with them, I don't even need to use protection!"

"Dad, you know I hate it when you nibble on my neck!"

"Do you like whips, chains, knives, and hot branding irons?"

"How do you feel about having sex in a room full of stuffed animals?"

"On top of stuffed animals?"

"Inside of stuffed animals?"

"With stuffed animals?"

 

[G.A.P.metal]

I got a rash,it won`t go away...you want to see it ?

 

[against the wind]

I took a shower and changed my underwear just for you, ,

 

[boogeyman]

Wow it's late! Can I borrow your phone? Gotta tell the wife not to wait up.

 

[diggummup]

Little Johnny On His First Date

A teacher is trying to teach good manners to her third-grade students.


She turned to her class and said, “Michael, if you were on a date having dinner with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?”


Michael said, “Just a minute, I have to go pee.”





The teacher responded by saying, “Well, that would be rude and impolite. What about you Sherman, how would you say it?”


Sherman said, “I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom. I’ll be right back.”


“That’s better, but it’s still not very nice to say the word bathroom at the dinner table. And you, little Johnny, can you behave for once and show us your good manners?”


Johnny said, “I would say: Darling, may I please be excused for a moment? I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, who I hope to introduce you to after dinner.”


That’s when the teacher fainted.

 

[Hillbilly Prince]

"How about I just give you forty bucks and we go straight to your house?"

 

[holepuncher]

Hello Jane err judy err Joan.

 

[A2coins]

funny post